There is probably already a thread on this but I fear in the length of time it takes me to look for it I will have produced over 26lbs of turd. I had a bad curry out of the fridge whilst watching the F1 today. Oh the irony that some of it has just left me at similar speeds to the cars I was so happily watching. Upon exitting my arrse nozzle it has then proceeded to make like a 145mph smash. The devistation of my bog is unreal and I fear tonight is going to be a lonely one spent sitting hugging my Winnie The Pooh pillow on the bog floor and Over dosing on kaolin and morphine. The most remarkable thing is I don't actually feel unwell yet. I have that nervousness that one gets just before inter company boxing when the other fella is actually a boxer and not like you just someone who is the right weight. I know sooner or later I'm going to be on the floor saying "Kill me now." Nope I am just currently experiencing the calm before the storm where I can still smell my horrifc farts from earlier and the aroma of my arrse payload drifting down the stairs. I just thought I would share this with you all. Hopefully one of you will call an ambulance if I don't post tomorrow.