Police called to gay domestic incident

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Howler, Dec 15, 2009.

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  1. Police were called today to a domestic dispute between two respected members of the Soho gay community who inadvertantly got their Prince Alberts entangled and started fighting over which member of Bronski Beat has the firmest kneecaps.

    "These two well known homosexuals first appeared on our radar in 1991 after 'going down hard' on some Arabs after spilling their load on a public highway from a considerable height" Police spokesman Tariq Aziz said today.

    John "Bruno" Nicols likes to dress up in flying gear whilst performing 'thrust' actions on his defenceless victims. He is known to frequent seedy military theme websites touting his "Medical" book which, in fact, contains dubious practices such as Thai gender realignment surgery and advanced rectal prolapse inducement.

    John "Liberace" Nicols was unavailable for comment as he had his mouth full.
     

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  2. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    You do realise John Nichol is a member of this site,dont you.
     
  3. Snigger.
     
  4. I think he knows perfectly well but I've no idea what the fcuk he's on about.

    John Nichol has always seemed all right to me.
     
  5. So's Nelson Mandela but even he laughs at his own expense........................especially when I headlock him, rap my knuckles on his head and shout 'Testing.................1, 2.............testing'
     
  6. I'm all for having a crack at the crabs but...

    ...i dont get it :oops:
     
  7. That "seedy military theme website" will be Arrse, then?
     
  8. the_boy_syrup

    the_boy_syrup LE Book Reviewer

    Did I miss something or Have I woke up in 1991?

    Nelson Mandela an advert that Prison does work

    He's never re offended

    Well done him
     
  9. FFS, you don't think a man who's been through what he has can't take a bit of ribbing?
    Grow a pair
     
  10. meridian

    meridian LE Good Egg (charities)

    Nice one :D
     
  11. If you have, you might have another crack at trying to be a soldier.
     
  12. the_boy_syrup

    the_boy_syrup LE Book Reviewer

    No thanks far to dangerous

    I like to check in not dig in

    Leave it to you lads :D
     
  13. He still owes me a tenner. :D
     
  14. That's funny, Nelson said to me "If that cnut gets me in a headlock one more time, I'll dress him in a football strip and set Winnie on him."
     
  15. Porridge_gun

    Porridge_gun LE Good Egg (charities)

    Not much point whining, John Nichol is only where he is now because he fell out of an Aeroplane in Jan 91

    He didn't get shot down, the aircraft manually ejecting him for being a crab puff.

    I thoroughly enjoyed watching him pass commentary in the SAAB Grippen, nice to see his shapely anus as he clambered out of the cab and made for the gents where another crab fellated him. Sadly the footage stopped at the toilet door.

    Tornado down, was sequeled with a lesser known book titled 'Meat through a lavatory wall' apparently from Stockholm syndrome in Iraq he got used to blowing chaps for food, fags and clean underpants.