Pointless briefings and unit pumpers

Ive just been on one. Arrse of the highest gravy of arrsehole. A briefing about doctrine (complete drivel) when it can be useful nearer to the time its needed. Also it was a opportunity for this LE officer to have his face time with the new CO, that was the real reason. The cunt couldnt even pronounce the words correctly that he was trying to say.

The biggest waste of my time off work ever, to be had to be called in to work for an absolutely pointless reason. He made it mandatory for all personnel. However it wasn't relavent to the all military personnel, i.e FTRS who dont deploy, attached arms who would never do the job, being the cocksmoker he is, he put out an email to all staff that it is mandatory attendance. Anyone else spent thier time on listening to bellends spout useless drivel and waste your spare time????????

Some officers just really don't know how to look after thier men.....However this man is reknowned pumper of the highest order


Book Reviewer
Sounds like my last RAO.
The TOT that used to be at 1Div, from 04-08, had to have the last word on every single conference call, such as 'Could all commanders ensure they adhere to strict convoy drills' all the while every single person had hung up on the cunt. Absolute nosh bag
Don't think it gets any better in civvy street. It's pretty much how modern management works.

For a highly-selective definition of 'works', obviously.

If it's been sent from my HTC Sensation using Tapatalk then I'm probably pissed.
Hmmmm. This has happened so much on the build up to H16 from my lot. RAO made a financial brief mandatory, I went in to show face and slid out to get out and do my work after the first brief. Next thing I know he's whingeing to the OC that the ASM is chinning off his presentation and that I should be AGAI'd!
As a 38 year old with 21 years in I find it rather patronising that he thinks that I need to sort my finances out before I go.
Wouldn't be so bad if a month later he didnt arrange another bout of the same briefs.
It also leads to another of my pet hates (the RAO fell into this perfectly) people who are shit at presentations. If you want to bullet point then bring the bullets in as you speak, shorten and just have the bullets up there for emphasis. Dont just read out a long sentence that you've written as it is mind feckingly dull and shows what a patronising tw@t you are.
Rant over
It gets no better.

I was gonna catch the cunt out on the presentation and ask him to explain some the long words he couldnt pronouce like ambiguity.....a bit like him vague and fucking dull... He even had the gall to call it a good read.
I was gonna catch the cunt out on the presentation and ask him to explain some the long words he couldnt pronouce like ambiguity.....a bit like him vague and fucking dull... He even had the gall to call it a good read.
Are you sure he's an LE - ambiguity is a real word, and most words they use are almost, but not quite, real words.
A personal favourite of mine - the three line whip for all personnel (read, all Juniors) to attend briefings about joining 22 SAS/264/216/299 and all the other special people out there.

Always given to a cookhouse/gym/training wing classroom full of bored, fat, downgraded Scaleys who are more likely to become the next Dalai Lama then pass Selection for any SF/SF type unit and attached personnel who've never even heard of the trade qualifications they'd need to join them because for some reason no-one ever considered teaching touch typing or morse to chefs or mechanics.


I like the ones where they pay thousands for civvy companies to come in and give presentations, the same week they give redundancy notifications.

It sits really well.
Funnily enough as we have our CIW coming up we've just had a "compulsory" EC brief. Again non exemption, all juniors, 4 seniors a sprog Troopy and the QM who's baby this thing is.
The Army really is having all the fun sucked out of it and I'm glad my time is coming to an end.
Any Equality & Diversity presentation. I particularly liked the one where we were berated by a 21 year old Asian Moslem bird about how the "English" army would never recruit people like her because we represented the "English" who oppressed people like her.

Went down well with me, the Dubliner, the Belfast Catholic, and the three Scots sitting in my group.
Ooooo. Another thread has just reminded me about going to BATUS.

That is a shitty first day of pointless briefings. The Canuck fireman brief is particularly dry. Even the ones that are slightly funny at first are fecking dull when the same jokes are told to you only a couple of months after being out there. (RMP Sgt I am talking to you!)
Strangely enough Sparky the worst unit I have been attached to was REME for wasting my valuable time.
How do you think we feel?!!
Your pain must be immense. Having the displeasure at serving at 1st shattalion REEME, is my worst field army unit.....

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