Discussion in 'Poetry Corner' started by durchy, Jan 4, 2010.

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  1. This is a non-military poem about my son, Tom. It means a lot to me so careful with the comments. Nice criticism welcome, as always.

    MY SON

    I never knew what life meant,
    Until the stork the gift sent,
    Hair of gold and eyes of blue,
    Apple cheeks and dimples too.
    I love you, little man.

    I think of holding you in my hands,
    A prince, but not of earthly lands,
    An angel dressed up in a nappy,
    How could I know that I'd be this happy?
    I love you, little man.

    Daddy now is not a soldier,
    Maybe you'll be, when you're older?
    But now just laugh and play and run,
    A man's no man without a son.
    I love you, little man.

    Now I don't see you as much as I'd like,
    To push on the swing and help with your bike.
    And I'm all alone with the TV and Stella,
    While you're back at home, with your Mum and her fella.
    Still I love you, little man.
  2. The_Duke

    The_Duke LE Moderator

    When did I miss the change of use from "Army Rumour Service" to "Durchy's terrible poetry forum"?

    Your few very bad military themed poems were bad enough, but at least sort of within the general gist of the forum. Can't you stick to posting the rest of them on "Bad poemz R us"?

    I can't believe that anyone would go to such much (wasted) effort for a wind up, but it is of course possible!
  3. Who is Stella? Why don't you knock her up and have another one?

    Happy New Year.....
  4. Command_doh

    Command_doh LE Book Reviewer

    Got to agree with The Duke. If you are expecting nice and fluffy comments about something that is (rightly so) important to you, Arrse isn't really the place for it. People here aren't exactly famed for their sensitivity and tact are they?
  5. Suppose not. Maybe I should just leave.
  6. You just want him to include you in a poem, dont you. :)
  7. It's Dusty In Here...

  8. I don't have a son. Are you calling me a poof?
  9. Well get the bloody polish out then.
  10. I used to have a little boy,
    I played with him all day long,
    I used him like a little toy,
    and pumped his little schlong

    One day a Judge said "I was bad"
    and that I was a molester,
    It's not my fault my name is Gadd,
    And now I've signed the register
  11. Real smatterings of Up the Junction there Durchy... especially with the telly & drinking comments. All together now:

    Alone here in the kitchen
    I feel there's something missing
    I'd beg for some forgiveness
    But begging's not my business
    And she won't write a letter
    Although I always tell her
    And so it's my assumption
    I'm really up the junction
  12. Awwww That's just beautiful Smudge :)
    I've come over all emotional now :oops:
  13. Yeh maybe. Bye then.
  14. That's harsh!

    I want to hear more kidyfiddling poetry! Can we get a bit more adventurous though? Perhaps a 3s up? Moresome? Toys, ice cubes and the like?