Pirates Vs Lasers

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by CharlieRomeoAlphaBravo, Jan 12, 2011.

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  1. topless lesbian laser wielding ninja pirates- just saying it makes you cream your pants
  2. This weapon was actually discovered purely by chance. A famous Ex-Pat Far eastern Author of military/pirate "faction novels" discovered that whilst photographing highly dangerous AK wielding, smacked-up Somali Pirates, his laser range finder fitted to the camera caused one of the pirates to swiftly turn away, like this:


    The rest, is history.......
  3. Any chance we could put these onto frickin sharks?
  4. Command_doh

    Command_doh LE Book Reviewer

    Hmmm, I wonder how long this remains so? Especially when 'frikking laser beams' become man portable and Uncle Spam (or its global 'Daddy' successor China) decides they are great for everyday use.
  5. What if canny pirates bring back low-tech eye patches to thwart hi-tech lasers? Aharrrr!
  6. but they'd have to wear one on each eye
  7. Fair one, but how about sunglasses with differentially polarised lenses? Then they would only go blind in one eye (temporarily) unless the devious pirate busters developed variable modulated lasers of course.
  8. But what if the pirates got their parrots upgraded to have frikkin laser beams on their heads.

    "Polly wanna....fffffffftttttttzzzzz!
  9. your losing me now
  10. [​IMG]
    Artist's impression of BAE's laser distraction system

    The artist should really have read the statement. Or perhaps he'd been dazzled.

    The pirates seem to have an adequate supply of Ready Brek.
  11. Command_doh

    Command_doh LE Book Reviewer

    Food of the gods. You can all stick yer laser beams, bring on the good stuff.
  12. Reminds me of the procedure for when we used to have V bombers hanging about the place waiting to jet off and drop a few buckets of instant sunshine on the communists. Someone realised that dropping these all over the place was likely to cause a large number of nuclear flashes that could seriously damage the eyesight or blind the V bomber pilots which might negatively affect their performance in finding the target and getting back home again. Resorting to cutting edge British technology it was decided to issue each of them eye patches with the co-pilot wearing two and the pilot one. Pilot starts flying with one eye covered and when they get hit by the first flash he takes off the patch and continues flying with his remaining good eye, when hit with the second flash the co-pilot removes one of his eye patches and takes over piloting the aircraft, when they get hit with a third flash he takes off his other eye patch and continues flying with his remaining eye, and if they get hit by a fourth nuclear flash well then they're all buggered and crash.
  13. The Jaguar pilots in Brüggen used to carry one eye patche each on exersise to protect them against the flash of the various buckets of sunshine being slung around. Lo-tech works!
    As for laser dazzling, I think our Russian friends used lasers to dazzle unwelcome maritime recce pilots over 20 years ago.