Pirate joke, pirate joke

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by bullet_catcher, Mar 30, 2013.

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  1. Little Johnny is being taught about pirates at school, and the teacher asks him "Where would you find the Buccaneers?"

    "Under the buckin' hat Miss" he replies.
  2. No not funny at all, why would he be wearing a bucking hat, what is a bucking hat and if such a thing exists what is it for?
  3. I don't wear a hat... so both of my rather large fcukin' ears are out in the open.
  4. That was for the 'Little Johnny' thread
    Where's ya buccaneers?
    On me buckin' head!
  5. What a bucking shit joke.
  6. You're right, it's rubbish, I prefer PG's version.
  7. If we're telling shit Pirate jokes, here goes -

    Q. Why are Pirates called Pirates?

    A. Cos they Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr!
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  8. You swine. I was just about to say that :)
  9. Me too, but thought wiser of it. (Just for a change)
  10. To get into specifics tankie, a bucking hat is what rodeo cowboys wear......beam me up Scotty!
    • Funny Funny x 1
  11. Pirate Joke:

    A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, 'Hey, I haven't seen you in a while.What happened? You look terrible.'

    'What do you mean?' said the pirate. 'I feel fine.'

    'What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before.'

    'We were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now.'

    'OK, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?'

    'In another battle I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand wascut off and I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really.'

    'What about that eye patch?'

    'Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up andone of them shit in my eye.'

    'You're kidding. You lost an eye from bird shit?'

    'Well, it was my first day with the hook.'
    • Funny Funny x 6
    • Like Like x 4
  12. A pirate goes to the doctor.
    "I have some moles on me back, matey," he said. "I'd be obliged if ye'd take a look at them.
    The doctor studies the moles for a while. "It's alright, he says, "they're benign."
    "Ye need to have a better look," said the pirate. "There be twelve, at least."
    • Funny Funny x 12
    • Like Like x 4
  13. And so, following on from that . . .

    Q. What do pirates want when they come ashore?

    A. To go for a jaaaarrrrrrrr.

    Q. Where do they go to get a wet?

    A. To the baaaarrrr.

    Q. How do they get there?

    A. By caaaaarrrrrr.

    Q. Where have I taken this?

    A. Too faaarrrrrr . . . .
    • Like Like x 3
    • Funny Funny x 1
  14. Q. What do pirates do to decompress after a particularly difficult cruise?

    A. Go on arrrrrr and arrrrrrr
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  15. Sailor goes into a pub and stood at the bar is a pirate whose head is the size of a tangerine.
    To cut a long joke short the pirate found a beautiful mermaid trapped in a fishing net on a beach and freed her. She granted him a wish and because he couldn't shag her (for she had no fanny) he asked for a little head.