Phobias! Clowns love them or hate them and other stuff

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by brass_magnet, Jun 25, 2006.

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  1. What gets you mad. I mean really mad. Angry to the point of wanting to rip someone to peices. with me Its Clowns they just arnt funny, and with me when I see one I have to be dragged away before I kill one of the big red nosed b astards. I have never seen the movie IT! so I know its not that, and I know other people have the same problem.

    What makes you pull your pin out?
  2. Oh my God, I am not alone. I fcuking hate clowns , really , properly hate them. I hated them long before Stephen King's 'IT' which only served to confirm my worst fears.

    Clowns are just fcuking properly evil. Big red noses, little black hearts.

    ....and fuckng clownshoes
  3. and clown's pockets :D :D :D

    Coco the clown from brassed off did give us a classic though; "So God was creating man. And his little assistant came up to him and he said: "Hey, we've got all these bodies left, but we're right out of brains, we're right out of hearts and we're right out of vocal chords." And God said: "Fuck it! Sew 'em up anyway. Smack smiles on the faces and make them talk out of their arses." And lo, God created the Tory Party."
  4. Sixty

    Sixty LE Moderator Book Reviewer
    1. ARRSE Cyclists and Triathletes

    Thought it was just me.

    I don't hate them a such, I fear them. Before I'm laughed off the thread ask yourselves this: it's 0300, you get out of your pit to go for a piss and Ronald McFcuckingDonald is standing at the end of your bed grinning. Would you not either a. be freaked or b. smack him?*

    *edit to add: about the head with your trusty lump hammer that you keep under your bed for the above eventuality.
  5. J_D

    J_D LE

    Michale Jackson's -Thriller! I can not watch the film, I can't even listen to the music, it freaks me out.
  6. Only one thing would scare me more at 0300 at the end of my bed; MDN


    (artist's impression... honest...)
  7. There need to be a new law banning clowns from towns and being able to be on the streets at anytime. The should be kept in a detention centre if court out of a circus tent.

    oh you'd just rip him a new smiley face. an set him on fire
  8. *shudders*

    Why would you even joke? WHY?!
  9. The zombies out of "28 days later". Fecking fast runners and brutal. Thank feck its fiction!!
  10. I'd wonder a) Where the f**k is my McDonalds? (b) Was i a good ride? :D
  11. Oh and Shawn of the Dead. cant do the music of white lines
  12. Have a laugh at this freakish phobia-sufferer:

    Buttons, ffs. Clowns I can perhaps understand, especially if you had been abused in your "secret places" by one as a child. "Buttons, dirty!" is just freakish behaviour that needs to be studied in an institute preferably with large quantities of electric shock therapy and mindbending drugs. Possibly also involving long courses of painful injections of disinfectant into your spine.
  13. The crocodile from the original Peter Pan film. It gave me reoccuring nightmares as a child. Skin 'em all and make 'em into handbags and shoes I say! *shudder*

    Another one - wasps. What is the point (no pun intended) of a wasp? Flies lay maggots, maggots then eat dead thing, ENDEX - not lying there for days rotting and stinking. A wasp comes anywhere near me and I end up like some crazy woman. Swatting, running, swearing. From the distance it looks like I'm par-taking of a very strange dance. I lose what little marbles I have and become irrational; once one flew in the car and I tried to exit the car, remembering at the last moment I was the one driving!

    Sharks - I physically want to throw up when I see them on the telly. Why, for the love of God, would anyone want to even consider diving with them. They have three rows of teeth FFS!

    I'm off for a shower now. Just the thought of those three wretched things make me want to scrub my skin. Ugh!

  14. I have Clown issues, thank fcuk I thought I was alone.

    I HATE them, they really really freak me out in a big way. The is no rhyme or reason to the fear just don't like them I suffer the old fight or flight thing when confronted AND unlike you PTP I've never managed to finish reading 'IT' OR watching 'IT'.

    AND for some ungodly fcuking reason my daughter collected the things..CLOWNS!!! WHY??????
    Raggy clowns, doll clowns, porcaline clowns - glass eyed creepy creepy things...*shudder* (please note the use of the word collected pass tense, I soon beat that out of her)

    I toooooooo have a fear of sharks, I even went swimming with the fcukers to overcome that fear! Did it work? NOOOOOOOO made me twenty times worse. Think Im the only person to be up the side of a mountain in a gorgeous rock pool to leap out of the water and ask if there are sharks in it, such is my fear!! (mong)

    I hear that JAWS tune everytime I step into water, yup includes the bath!! LMAO ugly ugly creatures....

    oooooooooh and Spiders 8O
  15. See with me, its an actual clown not a picture or a figure. I think its the face thats does it to me. Its there but you cant really see it not the real face, its hiding expressions and you cant tell what its going to do next so I strike first.

    Theres even a web site for this phobia - 24k