One of the sites that I look at to pass the time of day whilst i should be working is this

People can go on there and moan like fcuk about their work collegues. Its an excuse for weak people to vent their spleen as opposed to dragging the offender outside and giving him/her a good thrashing to point out the error of their ways. On the front page today is the shtiphantom. I personally find this funny. Good for the workplace but not for home.

It got me thinking, on our old squadron we had the phantom pen who would write things on the trap walls, they would then be replied to much like what we do now. It was an early naffi bar forum as we didnt have access to anything other than the intranet.

Anybody else have any phantoms at their place?
When I left the RAF in 96,I was in a shared house & we had a phantom food scoffer! That was until we caught the friend of one of the other residents scoffing my freshly made Vindaloo curry* & beat the sh1te out of him!!

* Portioned up & ready for the freezer!
in gornja vakuff, bosnia 97 we had a phantom sh1tter who used to lay logs the size of yule logs in the tcu's. those bad boys would not go away no matter how much flushing so it was always left for the skip-lickers to sort out.
Had a Phantom shit*er at secondary school, would write the word 'sh*t' in shi* about 5 feet high on the main wall of the toilets. Would also leave random logs on the floor or on the cisterns!! Never caught though!
I have known people that would drop one in trap 1 then shuffle round to trap 2 to clean up.

Would you be smug in people not knowing it was you or would you blab and sit back basking in the glory of the expression of the person who finds your arrse work?
Had a full screw in the Platoon who was'nt a Phantom at all,would just come in the room with his pance round his ankles and say "alright fellas" curl one out on the deck and then say "see yer laters",you could'nt get away with that in the Office !
The pesky phantom has followed me all through my so called career. (hence the ID) everywhere I go the bloody Phantom plays some stupid and peurile trick for which I get the blame. examples include the massive paif of bloomers on a flag pole and not the Regimental flag that should have been there, Huge Mr Whippyleft on the dias at ***** Barracks, a live sheep being taken into the NAAFI bar and later being left in a newly promoted Sgts room (where it ate the mattress and crapped everywhere) and fire extinguisher foam in the toilets to name but a few. All of these were not me, and were all at different locations.

I'm innocent, honest
another phantom sh1tter used to lay logs in lads flip-flops, go figure.
Had a bloke that used to shit in clear plastic bags and put it in other blokes Bergan's,usually around the area were they kept their rations !
We used to have a "phantom Andy Mcnabb (bab)" Male waste products would turn up all over the shop. Who ever its was (never found out who the beggar was) Had an indulgence for Our CVR(T) Fleet. Plop found on seats, hatches, Raden. One most athletic crimp was deposited on the aiming head on one unlucky MCT. Its wasn't just aimed at our green fleet, our green blokes got its as well. One poor lad ended up turd on his chest! my door handle, urinal. Knobby brown logs every-fecking-where. Quite funny, Not for the poor sods who had to clean up!

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