Penis for hire

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by Forces_Sweetheart, Aug 1, 2002.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. FROM E-BAY:  (Perhaps we should bid for the butt-cheeks to advertise ARRSE'?!)

    Your logo on my husband's penis
    Item # 1754669488
    Everything Else:Services:General

           Currently      £255.00   (reserve not yet met)            First bid      £1.00
    Quantity      1            # of bids      7   bid history
    Time left      5 days, 9 hours +            Location      Exeter
                     Country/Region      United Kingdom /Bristol
    Started      30-Jul-02 23:56:45 BST             mail this auction to a friend
    Ends      06-Aug-02 23:56:45 BST             watch this item
    Payment      Postal Order/Banker's Draft. See item description for payment methods accepted      
    Postage      Buyer pays for all postage costs. Will arrange for local pickup only (no postage).      


    OK, this auction is on behalf of my husband who is auctioning tattoo space on his penis, the winning bidder gets their design / message / logo tattooed on his penis, with the following provisos. a/ If it is a copyright or trademark the winning bidder must be the undisputed registered copyright / trademark holder.b/ The winning bidder does not have any automatic right to photograph the finished article or use said photograph, and any such promotional usage to be negotiated by separate agreement. Failing mutual agreement no photographs shall be taken.c/ He reserves the right to choose the tattooist (for reasons of health / safety) and the right to refuse certain inks / colours on the grounds of health / safetye/ He reserves the right to refuse designs that he considers offensive, immoral, or objectionable.f/ In addition to the bid fee, the auction winner pays all his expenses including any incurred by any of the above clauses.g/ No tattooing will commence until he has been paid in full and monies are cleared in his bank.h/ No refunds will be given under any circumstances with the sole exception of his refusing to have the tattoo applied.i/ He reserves the right to have the tattoo removed at his own expense, if he so chooses, after a period of not less than 24 months, medical reasons notwithstanding.j/ The tattoo will be confined to the exterior skin only, not the glans.k/ The auction winner may at their option use one buttock instead of his penis, both buttocks = 50% surcharge.l/ make him a REALLY good offer, and if he likes the product / design, you can use his entire body except hands / feet / face.m/ buyer pays all ebay fees and commissions. This isn't a wind up. If you have any questions please ask, all questions will be answered by my husband and not me 'cos it is his penis after all :)
  2. bizarre
  3. F_S

    One begs the question, what were you looking for when you just happened to come across that little number??? :eek: ;)
  4. A colleague of mine was sent it.  It's doing the rounds on e-mail. I have sent it to the Sun- it's a classic for them.
  5. What a scary thought.....I suppose that the name of that famous Welsh railway station would be a suggestion if I was the unfortunate soul.
  6. Great. Just what we need.
  7. Reminds me of the old joke...
    One nurse says to another, ''have you seen that patient in bed 6? He's got 'Ludo' tattooed on his penis''. The other smiles and says, ''when I saw it, it said 'Llandudno''....
  8. They've clearly nicked the idea from MDN...
  9. LMAO, I sell a lot of stuff on Ebay and my hub buys stamps. I had to look that Ebay number up, yea, I was curious. Ebay took it off.

    But it was funny. :D

    I didn't realize that this thread was started in 2002. Of course the ad on Ebay is gone, duh :oops:

  10. Forces sweetheart: Think you will have disapointed alot of lonely crabs with that thread title. They'll have to go back to cruising again now.
  11. What, Mold?

  12. Just when you think that you have seen and heard it all something as bizarre as this rears it's ugly head. :?

    There are some very strange folks out there 8O