Parking Attendants - Humanitys Excrement

#1
Ive got another parking ticket. Parking Attendants are all shit munching, foul smelling, sexually fustruted useless cunts of people, incable of getting a proper job and therefore spend their days wandering around reenforcing their own pathetic self image of people with some form of authority. They should all be shot or repeatedly raped by rabid hounds, then shot. Far from being a rant, does anyone know any ingenius ways of getting out of parking tickets, short of bombing the ticket office?
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#4
Back in the good old days when ring pull cans had rings that pulled off, evil persons used to jam the ring pull in the meter, thus cattling it. Not me of course. Evil persons. Yes.

I recently saw a warden in London sticking a ticket on a car then photographing it with a digi-cam. WTF is that all about?
 
#5
Its the new system. They have to photgraph it for proof or some such thing. In the old days if you managed to get to your car and drive off before they slapped the ticket on, you could feck them off but now they just snap a piccy and send a ticket through the post. No getting away from the useless cnuts.
 
#6
buggrit said:
Its the new system. They have to photgraph it for proof or some such thing. In the old days if you managed to get to your car and drive off before they slapped the ticket on, you could feck them off but now they just snap a piccy and send a ticket through the post. No getting away from the useless cnuts.
Not quite true... the ticket hasn't been issued until its been stuck to the car. They take a picture of the ticket on the car to prove its been issued and that you were parked illegally. If you drive off before the tickets been stuck on (as i have done) then you'll get no fine.

That said, the law is bizarre (i know 'cos i checked it out last time i got a ticket). Did you know that if they issue you a ticket and aren't wearing their hat then it doesn't count... odd but true. So if you've got a camera phone, repay the compliment and take a snap of them minus their headgear.

TB
 
#8
Have a dutch registered car and throw the thing back and the fcukers telling them to get fcuked works quite well I understand :D
 
#9
Arby, did you knowingly park in a pay & display without buying a ticket or park somewhere obviously illegal?
In that case, you'll just have man up and do what I did the last two f*cking times I got caught parking in a p&d car park without paying - cough up.





Then find out which car is his and smear it with his own daughter's entrails.
:twisted:
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#11
TopBadger said:
Did you know that if they issue you a ticket and aren't wearing their hat then it doesn't count... odd but true. So if you've got a camera phone, repay the compliment and take a snap of them minus their headgear.

TB
Bizzarre traffic warden encounters #2. East Bolden near Sunderland. A traffic warden on a scooter. Wearing a crash helmet. Mind you, the idea of stopping my car in East Bolden is silly, so I suppose I'll never get to test this one.
 
#12
i watched a program last week (the news i think) in which we were told that there was a book hundreds of pages long regarding to parking regs. If for example the parking bays are not marked exactly as they should be then it is an 'illegal fine' so tell them to shove it. All you have to do now if find relevant regulations and go out in the world and then find the 'loop hole' you require...

genuine stuff though, there was a guy who made it his lifes work (hobby) to get people off parking tickets!

Good luck
 
#13
Father_Gundulph said:
Tax_Tw-t said:
Then find out which car is his and smear it with his own daughter's entrails.
:twisted:
Harsh, but fair.
But of course. One civil servant to another, professional courtesy, that sort of thing.
I'm sure he wouldn't want any special treatment on his tax. Not that he'd get any. Well, except for "special" treatment of course :wink:
 
#14
Lifes not a free ride you fucking chopper. Do you expect to sit in the cinema and watch a film without paying?
I bet you don't tax or insure your car either.
 
#16
Letter in today's Torygraph from an old dear who got a ticket because her spaccabadge was the wrong way round-she appealed to say it might have been upside down, but wrong way round is completely different-she won.
 
#17
kingburn_99 said:
i watched a program last week (the news i think) in which we were told that there was a book hundreds of pages long regarding to parking regs. If for example the parking bays are not marked exactly as they should be then it is an 'illegal fine' so tell them to shove it. All you have to do now if find relevant regulations and go out in the world and then find the 'loop hole' you require...

genuine stuff though, there was a guy who made it his lifes work (hobby) to get people off parking tickets!

Good luck
The book is Traffic Signs and General Directions 2003. It costs about £25 and while it is not difficult reading you do have to pay attention as there are many schedules.
PA's are the most awful people in the world along with airport security staff. They will resort to any dirty trick to meet their targets.
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#18
shroud_shifter said:
Lifes not a free ride you fucking chopper. Do you expect to sit in the cinema and watch a film without paying?
I bet you don't tax or insure your car either.
Go fuck yourself you fucking state apparatus slimey fuckturd.

I don't mean to sound so harsh, but you are defending a deliberate state policy of raising revenue through the method of reducing free parking spaces by charging for more on-street parking.

By defending such, this makes you either a complete cunt, or a parking gestapo or both. Fucking throbber. :evil:
 

Ventress

LE
Moderator
#19
If you are ever ticketed for parking on double yellow lines, check the very end is "T" off, which shows the end of the lines. No T no double yellows- most are but if you are lucky the local council is shite you will be able to appeal it. Appeal any ticket with a palusable excuse and you may find the parking manager on the day in generous mood and you might get let off.
 
#20
put a sign on the windscreen saying "attn courier delivering" ...thats wahat couriers and delivery blokes do round my way.

or i hear that disabled parking badges are quite popular on the black market. however i disagree with stealing these....it would be useful to have though
 
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