Parking Attendants - Humanitys Excrement

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by arby, May 7, 2008.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Ive got another parking ticket. Parking Attendants are all shit munching, foul smelling, sexually fustruted useless cunts of people, incable of getting a proper job and therefore spend their days wandering around reenforcing their own pathetic self image of people with some form of authority. They should all be shot or repeatedly raped by rabid hounds, then shot. Far from being a rant, does anyone know any ingenius ways of getting out of parking tickets, short of bombing the ticket office?
  2. register your vehicle to a P.O. Box, then just say you wernt the driver. they cant do anything about it. same with spped cameras. enjoy.
  3. I hate you.
  4. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Back in the good old days when ring pull cans had rings that pulled off, evil persons used to jam the ring pull in the meter, thus cattling it. Not me of course. Evil persons. Yes.

    I recently saw a warden in London sticking a ticket on a car then photographing it with a digi-cam. WTF is that all about?
  5. Its the new system. They have to photgraph it for proof or some such thing. In the old days if you managed to get to your car and drive off before they slapped the ticket on, you could feck them off but now they just snap a piccy and send a ticket through the post. No getting away from the useless cnuts.
  6. Not quite true... the ticket hasn't been issued until its been stuck to the car. They take a picture of the ticket on the car to prove its been issued and that you were parked illegally. If you drive off before the tickets been stuck on (as i have done) then you'll get no fine.

    That said, the law is bizarre (i know 'cos i checked it out last time i got a ticket). Did you know that if they issue you a ticket and aren't wearing their hat then it doesn't count... odd but true. So if you've got a camera phone, repay the compliment and take a snap of them minus their headgear.

  7. so no way around it? Im going to find him and Im going to harm him.
  8. Ord_Sgt

    Ord_Sgt RIP

    Have a dutch registered car and throw the thing back and the fcukers telling them to get fcuked works quite well I understand :D
  9. Arby, did you knowingly park in a pay & display without buying a ticket or park somewhere obviously illegal?
    In that case, you'll just have man up and do what I did the last two f*cking times I got caught parking in a p&d car park without paying - cough up.

    Then find out which car is his and smear it with his own daughter's entrails.
  10. Harsh, but fair.
  11. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Bizzarre traffic warden encounters #2. East Bolden near Sunderland. A traffic warden on a scooter. Wearing a crash helmet. Mind you, the idea of stopping my car in East Bolden is silly, so I suppose I'll never get to test this one.
  12. i watched a program last week (the news i think) in which we were told that there was a book hundreds of pages long regarding to parking regs. If for example the parking bays are not marked exactly as they should be then it is an 'illegal fine' so tell them to shove it. All you have to do now if find relevant regulations and go out in the world and then find the 'loop hole' you require...

    genuine stuff though, there was a guy who made it his lifes work (hobby) to get people off parking tickets!

    Good luck
  13. But of course. One civil servant to another, professional courtesy, that sort of thing.
    I'm sure he wouldn't want any special treatment on his tax. Not that he'd get any. Well, except for "special" treatment of course :wink:
  14. Lifes not a free ride you fucking chopper. Do you expect to sit in the cinema and watch a film without paying?
    I bet you don't tax or insure your car either.