The lead actor in the local Pantomime production of Aladdin was raped, by the gay genie on stage last night. be fair the audience did try to warn him.
Was that the same production which the annual outing of the Paranoid Schizophrenic Society attended? "The evening was going swimmingly," a spokesman said "but then somebody called out 'He's behind you' and it all went to ratchet..."

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