Paderborn Housing

Im soon to be posted to Paderborn and have applied for a quarter for my family.
As my son lives with me now and he was born before my marriage they asked for child benefit forms which Ive sent.
However my problem is that my daughters live with the first wife but are keen to live with me so Ive put them on my A10s
The housing people say that they need proof this will happen which I cant give as my ex is a pain in the arrse
The welfare office here wants me to get a soliciter and go for sole parental rights which again upsets the apple cart as my ex and I are bareley on speaking terms and being realistic i have a penis so the judge wont go in my favour.
So basically whats the ruling on housing in Paderborn Im only on the list for a two bed qtr but really need a three as my lad is coming upto his teens and my girls are teens
Even if they dont come to live with me straight away they will visit during all of their school holidays, if they have their own room (My exs words not mine) also what the hell do I do with all their stuff, bedroom furniture etc. I know the old "its not our problem" comment but seriously what is the score, so my questions are,
1. Is Paderborn garrison really that full (I also mean the surrounding areas as my wife and i drive)?
2. Whats the legal implications regarding different sex children sharing?
3. If my ex is a pain and the girls dont come but Ive been allocated a 3 bed qtr can they make me move?
4. What is the timescale for children of different sex sharing?
5. How big are the 2 bed qtrs and are they ok?

Any help with this would be gratefull
And thanks for taking the time to read this.

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