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OUCH!!

#1
My mate just called and I'm half laughing and half crossing my legs.

He got a phone call from another mate who needed his help pretty damn quick, just told him to drive round ASAP!

Upon arrival he found our mate doubled up and in pain and asking be taken to A&E...

Turns out he was having sex with his missus, she was on top, bouncing for all her worth and, yes you guessed it...she came off and came back down straight onto his member; snapping it!

Our poor mate said his dick was at a weird angle and his balls were black and the size of a grapefruit!!!!! OUCH!!!! 8O 8O 8O
 
#6
That sound fcuking painful! I had a no less (to me) painful experience yesterday when I awoke with the usual mornig glory. went to pump the old bilges and help the most excrutiating pain. Turns out my Kidney Stone had reached the end of my old man. It felt like someone had put a drawing pin through my helmet. Luckily I passed it on the next visit. I wouldn't wish Kidney Stones on my worst enemy (well I would actually)
 
#8
Please please please

post an update on the situation when you get back from the hospital........

The tears are welling up in my eyes as I type!
 
#9
happened to a mate , exactely the same senario. He dragged himself into the toilet to have a look , peels back his 4 to have a look and fainted with the pain. :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :oops: :oops:
 
#11
jagman said:
Please please please

post an update on the situation when you get back from the hospital........

The tears are welling up in my eyes as I type!

I didn't take him...my mate that told me about it did. I'll get a sitrep tomorrow.
 
#12
pompey said:
jagman said:
Please please please

post an update on the situation when you get back from the hospital........

The tears are welling up in my eyes as I type!

I didn't take him...my mate that told me about it did. I'll get a sitrep tomorrow.
Oops sorry mis-read :oops:
But you could do your duty to Arrse and get round to casualty with a camera for an update...... 8O

Trying to be sympathetic honestly
 
#13
jagman said:
pompey said:
jagman said:
Please please please

post an update on the situation when you get back from the hospital........

The tears are welling up in my eyes as I type!

I didn't take him...my mate that told me about it did. I'll get a sitrep tomorrow.
Oops sorry mis-read :oops:
But you could do your duty to Arrse and get round to casualty with a camera for an update...... 8O

Trying to be sympathetic honestly

Apparently he did get footage on the camera phone!! I'll see what I can do (in the name of science and all that!)
 
#14
Happened to a mate of mine in the late 80s, he was out of commission for about 6 weeks, he only spent a few hours with a rod up his Jap's eye and no sex for a few weeks; Apparently it really hurt. (no sh1t?)

He had a recommissioning party for his chopper a month or so later when the spongiform tissue had healed.
 
#16
Furryturd said:
Happened to a mate of mine in the late 80s, he was out of commission for about 6 weeks, he only spent a few hours with a rod up his Jap's eye and no sex for a few weeks; Apparently it really hurt. (no sh1t?)

He had a recommissioning party for his chopper a month or so later when the spongiform tissue had healed.
recommissioning party? did he take onboard his full complete of seamen???
 
#17
It really can happen! I've seen it twice in my career so far.

Hopefully for him it will just be badly bruised and he will be out of action for a month or so. Worse case scenario is that his penis is fractured (the blood holding soft tissues can act like a bone when erect and snap across the tissue planes). If so he will need to have his penis dissected under anaesthesia and the various component structures repaired...and it is sometimes never the same again!

You wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy would you?

tell him good luck

N_D
 

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