Fat mess from The Only Way is Essex. I nearly shot a malteser into my pants I was laughing so much when the old fucker in the show completely ignored her and chatted up some other tart. I tried to wank over this, and was going to put it in the "Lady Thread". I couldn't bring myself to do either, It felt dirty. Nanny Pat is another matter though, i'd make her wrinkled face look like a crinkly fry thats been covered in icing, like a sexual version of a Coffee Choux bun. The Only Way Is Essex's Gemma Collins hits bootcamp in a sports bra and tiny shorts | Mail Online Enjoy.