Hi All
I'm a newbie.
I've recently got involved with a guy who's been serving for a few years now. I'm a civi and admit I know bugger all about army life...
The things is, I've sort of known this guy for years, but only been chatting to him in a, I guess you'd say, romantic way for a couple of months. I've spent precious little time actually with him at this point in time. I like him lots but I donât feel like I know him that well yet.
The relationship started off as mainly sexual, then emotions kind of came afterwards and we do have a deeper thing than just lust now IMO.
The problem is that he's going away for months soon, and he's said that he will not mess around with anyone else while he's talking to and seeing me. Which should be music to my ears, but itâs not.
I donât think I can honestly say that I'll be true to someone I donât feel like I even half know yet. Much as I do like him, what if I spend the next 6 months waiting for someone, who then comes home and we spend proper time together, and I discover he's a complete tw@t?? (worst case scenario, but thatâs me - Iâm a realist!)
I'm also not naive. Why would he be any different and promise to stay faithful to someone he hardly knows, who knows bugger all about what he does, and wont see for the next half a year??
So, I want to suggest that we do keep in touch and continue to get to know each other and meet up when he's back. BUT, that while we're apart we can see other people, as long as there are rules (no mutual friends, always play safe etc)
We have pretty open discussions and I do feel like I can talk to him about anything. But seeing as he brought up the conversation on the exclusive arrangement, I'm a little scared of blowing the whole thing before it's startedâ¦
â¦.Or did he only say it because he thought that's what I wanted to hear?
OK, bring on your opinions please......
I'm a newbie.
I've recently got involved with a guy who's been serving for a few years now. I'm a civi and admit I know bugger all about army life...
The things is, I've sort of known this guy for years, but only been chatting to him in a, I guess you'd say, romantic way for a couple of months. I've spent precious little time actually with him at this point in time. I like him lots but I donât feel like I know him that well yet.
The relationship started off as mainly sexual, then emotions kind of came afterwards and we do have a deeper thing than just lust now IMO.
The problem is that he's going away for months soon, and he's said that he will not mess around with anyone else while he's talking to and seeing me. Which should be music to my ears, but itâs not.
I donât think I can honestly say that I'll be true to someone I donât feel like I even half know yet. Much as I do like him, what if I spend the next 6 months waiting for someone, who then comes home and we spend proper time together, and I discover he's a complete tw@t?? (worst case scenario, but thatâs me - Iâm a realist!)
I'm also not naive. Why would he be any different and promise to stay faithful to someone he hardly knows, who knows bugger all about what he does, and wont see for the next half a year??
So, I want to suggest that we do keep in touch and continue to get to know each other and meet up when he's back. BUT, that while we're apart we can see other people, as long as there are rules (no mutual friends, always play safe etc)
We have pretty open discussions and I do feel like I can talk to him about anything. But seeing as he brought up the conversation on the exclusive arrangement, I'm a little scared of blowing the whole thing before it's startedâ¦
â¦.Or did he only say it because he thought that's what I wanted to hear?
OK, bring on your opinions please......