One Step Ahead of the Game

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by gloworm, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Bullsh*t and Brilliance
    A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged Labrador named Bruce, along for the company.

    One day the Lab starts chasing butterflies and before long, Bruce discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

    The old Lab thinks, 'Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!' Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old Lab exclaims loudly, 'Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?'

    Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. 'Whew!' says the leopard, 'that was close! That old Labrador nearly had me!'

    Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old Labrador sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

    The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, 'Here, monkey, hop on my back and we'll see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!

    Now, the old Labrador sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, 'What am I going to do now?', but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old Lab says...

    'Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!

    Moral of this story....
    Don't mess with old f*rts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullsh*t and brilliance only come with age and experience.