Bad advice! Don't be so negative! Some of my best adventures have come from volunteering for things I thought I understood but it turned out I didn't.
Any chance you could plug the bugger and claim you clocked Daesh but they ran away?Taking a bit of a gamble in Syria a few years ago my team, consisting of me, a reporter and a British security 'adviser' travelled by moped up a narrow corridor to a YPG position. Things got a bit hectic and we found ourselves in danger of being cut off by ISIS.
We had a serious discussion about what we were going to do if ISIS were near to capturing us and the real possibility of suicide was discussed (once we'd fought them off for as long as we could of course... haha) Our rather somber discussion eventually descended into an argument between me and the adviser about who would get to shoot the journalist...
Being a sensitive soul it disnae bother me. Once at work whilst in mixed company, a bloke made the mistake of calling me a wan ker, and meaning it. The conversation went one way as I...smiled sweetly and said yes I am a wanker...but I'm a happy wanker, how about you...don't you enjoy a good wank...don't tell me, you're one of those blokes who never wan ks? By this time the cheeks were puffed way out, beetroot red and the steam was on the verge of boiling his tiny brain. Funnily he refrained from addressing me in that manner on any further occasion.We had a Richard Head in Cyprus (light infantry I think, or was it the Scottish lot? ) didn't like being called Dick for some reason.