Olaf Horse Cock - how not to go down in Viking History

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by Wordsmith, Jun 13, 2011.

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  1. Wordsmith

    Wordsmith LE Book Reviewer

    There have been many mighty warriors over the centuries. Alexander the Great conquered Asia, Ivan the Terrible made Russia tremble. Charles the Bold bestrode France like a colossus, Eric the Blood Axe filled the Vikings with fear.

    Sadly, one of Eric Blood Axes's compatriots did not fare so well in history. A practical joke went wrong, and now history knows him as Olaf Horse Cock. The story is told in the Icelandic sage Flateyjarbók.

    Link to translation of story below - its a pretty bizarre one...

    http://notendur.hi.is/eybjorn/ugm/volsi.html

    So let's raise a glass to Olaf Horse Cock - horse cock waver turned saint!

    Wordsmith
     
  2. I have the same nickname.
     
  3. Frey worship was most prevalent amongst the Swedes, who remained Pagan untill the early 12th century, at least as far north as Uppsala.
     
  4. Served the tosser right for converting to Christianity...

    1222554154589.jpg.[roflposters.com].myspace.jpg
     
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  5. Sounds a bit like my Viking name - All-Laugh Hamster Cock....
     
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  6. Was it because his favorite stallion fucked him to death?
     
  7. "Ivar the boneless" had a similar phallic based handle, he was either a human squid, hard to believe for a viking king who kicked arse, or he couldn't get a hard on.
     
  8. snigger.. fnurk fnurk
     
  9. On 25th September 1066, Harald Hardraade, Harald III of Norway, died at the Battle of Stamford Bridge (Chelsea eventually went on to win the league in the 1066/1067 season despite being deducted 15 points for the battle). His son, Olaf Haraldsson became King of Norway and ruled from 1066-1093 as Olaf III. He became known as Olaf the Quiet (Olav Kyrre) in a period of peace which saw the decline of the Vikings as a military force. Not a great moniker for a Viking really, Olaf the Quiet … imagine you need a great bellowing voice when setting out to rape and pillage.
     
  10. By 'eck that wasn't the most entertaining fifteen minutes of my life.
     
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  11. And you're not alone. **** that was dull.
     
  12. It's no wonder that the vikings lost their grip, I used to think they'd been bled dry, sending all their best genetic material on raids and long voyages by sea and land. That I thought would explain the limp wristed scandinavians of today. But having read this, perhaps they all topped themselves to escape the boredom.
     
  13. Except yours has 'the' instead of 'horse' in the middle :)
     
  14. apparently the modern day viking invaders have upgraded to flip flops and turbans.
     
  15. Can't understand why everybody is 'avin a pop at the
    Angle Irons..........