Oh No!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by trombone84, Feb 20, 2008.

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  1. I've just got that all too familiar gurgle from my guts. Me and my hoop are in for a bad day tomorrow... bastard... just thought you'd like to know.
  2. immodium lots and lots and if that does not work try some wet wipes
  3. I look on the bright side when l have days like this. At least when it happens l lose some weight :D
  4. Thank-you so much for sharing.

    Spuds, lots, to bung you up.

    Alternatively eat some chili which will give you something to concentrate on, and helps you hold it in, rather than face the ring of fire again. :x
    It also has the advantage of making the atmosphere unbearable for everyone else, - If you are going to suffer then they are too. :toilet:
  5. Line your manpanties with bog paper in case you squid out. Might save a brown egg on the outside kellies but possibly make you look like a doofus if some sheets fall down the pant leg.

    .. I'm not talking from experience, really I'm not.
  6. The dreaded Calcutta Splutter. Try a couple of spoons of cornflour in a glass with a little water. That should turn the lot to cement.

    Only problem is you can't fax Downing Street for about a week and when you eventually do you can feel your hip bones crackle as you expel the giant peanut studded monster from your mudbox.
  7. Make sure you leave a pressie in someones kettle it always boosts your morale in the time of dire needs, be around when they do boil the kettle also, its quality espically if its someone of importance. :twisted:
  8. Poop into an ice tray. Freeze said poop. Meanwhile melt some chocolate (it doesn't have to be high quality). When poop is frozen solid release from the tray and cover the hardened pieces in the melted chocolate. Leave on the desk of the least favourite munter in the place. I would strongly advise a discreet video camera, linked to U-Tube.
  9. Trombone, I sympathise as last nights rather excellent beef vindaloo and I have just parted company. The uncomfortavle warmth in the ring was eased by the gaging sound in the next door thunder trap.

    Let it out mate - short term pain for long term gain etc....

    Legs - I like your style!
  10. Thank fuck the roads weren't busy on the way home! I may have done some irreversible damage though. :(

    Attached Files:

  11. That pic is just.....all kinds of wrong. You are dead inside. and I mean Physically not emotionally.
  12. That is most definitly something to be very proud of. I like the way it has splattered slightly on the sides, resembling a small flock of starlings. good work. :D
  13. I think one of those larger lumps is a bit of lung. I feel empty.
  14. empty yes, but proud.
  15. Is it wrong that i'm considering a self-achievement-thrap over all of this?