Officers. Military Academy or?

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by FlakeShag, Jan 9, 2007.

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  1. Just out of interest, I was wondering, and have been wondering how men become officers. I see and hear all the time about early twenty year olds becoming officers.

    Can you train to become an officer and then be assigned a unit or do you need some years of service before you get the stripes?

    Also, is this the same for the Marine Commandos as it is the Army?
  2. Flakeshag,
    I've had the misfortune to read a few of your posts tonight, and must admit that I'm left with the impression that you are a complete throbber.

    Hopefully I'm mistaken, but I really don't think I am.
    Please prove me wrong.
    Kind regards

  3. Please tell me this is a wah?
  4. It's a cunning terrorist plot to suss out our recruiting process.

    Say nothing!
  5. Men become officers by a secret process known as osmosis. They first get to know someone who has been an officer, or who knows someone who has, then they absorb all the knowledge they can from their chosen individual.

    Once they have absorbed it they enter a kind of reality television competition in which people ring in and vote for how many stripes they should have.

    Television audiences will whoop and hoot until the required level of hysteria is reached, then the Queen will appear to bestow the requisite number of stripes on the officer.

  6. Very funny.

    This is legitimate interest, its a few simple questions.

    Tartan_Terrier, maybe you could enlighten me on my failings & what a 'throbber' is over a PM or two.

    Ta lads.
  7. Good Lord no, let's keep it in the public domain so no-one can run crying to Matron.

    So do I!

    As I said before, please prove to me that you're not a throbber, I'd hate to be right!

    Kind regards

  8. Don't officers buy their commisions anymore?
  9. To answer your questions:

    men don't become officers, crying screaming spoilt kids become officers, men become soldiers, jncos and sncos

    officers don't get stripes they get pips and crowns - soldiers, jncos and sncos get stripes and eventually a crown

    who gives a shit about marine commandos - this is arrse
  10. Fcuk I hope they all do. Just spent a fcuking fortune on mine!
  11. Actually this bits not far of the mark if the chosen one is a Platoon Sgt.
  12. You forgot the bit about the secret handshake by which osmosis is facilitated. Oooooooooooops, did I just give away a secret?
  13. Officers are secretly elected by the mail order manager of Pakeham Catto and Carter. Any 19 to 21 year old buying a pair of sky blue cords, red moleskins and clashing tweed jumper is interviewed at his club by a retired colonel. They are then commissioned into their father's old regiment.

    The only exception to this rule is the RLC, who get their officers from a transport management agency. Oh and the Parachute Regiment who only recruit men named Rupert apparently...
  14. Dont you know? First son gets the inheritance, second into the Army, third into the Church. I thought everyone knew.

    That whole Pakeman thing is designed to weed out the aspirant nouveaux - your nanny should make you those clothes, which explains the three inch gap between the turn-ups and the shoes.
  15. maninblack

    maninblack LE Book Reviewer

    This was too good to stay in the land of the living, I gave it a chance but, hey....its pants.