Off Down the Pub on Saturday Night?

My local has stuck a bunch of tables and chairs outside. If they are open tomorrow afternoon or Saturday I'll buy a lunchtime pint but I won't be hanging around for a session.


War Hero
My local started opening for 'takeaways', a few evenings a week.
The weekend before last and because it was sunny, they opened on a Saturday lunchtime. Within the hour you had about 60 -80 men standing outside drinking their takeaways, and then peeing in the local hedges and people's gardens.

Now it's not open at all.
The 13th by the look of it, but only beer gardens and social distancing making it as fin as the Labour Party conference
I still cannot figure out how social distancing and drinking at a pub is going to work out TBH. By the time half the punters have had a skinful they went even know their own names let alone what 2 metres is!!

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War Hero
Stopped going to our local several years ago when they could not get a food or drinks order right. This wasn't just once but regularly. The landlady was far too concerned with nipping out for a fag than she was managing.

We have new tenants in the pub. They posted their effors on FB. The cosy local now looks like a cross between a tart's boudoir and some London pikey's idea of what a traditional village pub should look like in their imagination. Imported London "chef", new beaten copper top bar (the bar in the pub has never had a copper top n the 25+ years that I've known it) and a new "posh nosh" menu, plus a slection of designer gins.

Even the [adult] kids have vetoed going in

Personally, I'll not be going as I have some health issues and won't be going near a bunch of half-cut beer starved pillocks.
Red Lion or The Vine?
Red Lion. Been drinking there for around Forty years although I have cut back significantly in the last couple of years.

If I’m out though, that’s where I’ll be!
Bottle says "Enjoy chilled":)
That's because OSH is now owned by Greene King who in the past few years have been trying to market their ale to youngsters. They used to be a good brewery (Abbott Ale) but now are just a corporate giant, buying up a lot of indepenedent brewery's and selling their beer like alcopops.

"Enjoy chilled" written on a beer bottle, used to mean relax when drinking.

I blame Thatcher and white middle class hetrosexual men!
Red Lion. Been drinking there for around Forty years although I have cut back significantly in the last couple of years.

If I’m out though, that’s where I’ll be!
I haven't been there for many years, but I remember it as a nice old boozer. I think it's a Fuller's house... or it used to be.

It was a particular favourite of a colleague of mine. Unfortunately, one night he collapsed at the bar with a fatal heart attack. He was a lovely chap, but if ever there was a candidate for such a demise, it was he. He used to cane the overtime. He's the only bloke I know who managed to fall asleep during an interview. The interview tape was hilarious. You could hear his questioning gradually tail off into steady snoring. Even the prisoner was laughing. I don't think that the poor bloke was that far off retirement.

Further along the Uxbridge Road towards Hayes End, there were some proper dives, like the Heath Tavern, the Carpenters, the Adam & Eve and the Star. The Angel wasn't too bad, or the Vine round the corner in Angel Lane.

I'd be quite surprised if any of them still existed.


Book Reviewer
I'll give it a couple of days and let the kids get overexcited. I'll then hit it on a weekday afternoon next week when I hope the crowds will have thinned out.
I think it was a bit of a bad move to open the pubs for the first time in three months on a Saturday! Good luck to any publicans who do that - it's not compulsory of course but I guess they fear competition if they don't.

We don't go near pubs on Fridays or Saturdays, preferring to go out on week nights a) because it's quieter, and b) because we can.

I just hope the resulting carnage doesn't result in a further lockdown and curtailment of our quiet, moderate entertainment. :eek:
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Book Reviewer
And sweaty ham and cheese rolls from under a glass cover that have been in the sun all day.
Don't knock it, many's the time I've scoffed some of those up at no cost to the landlord. :-D
This what I miss about my local boozer. The landlord told me that a pirate used to drink in there, and he wandered in after a while of not being in.
You don't look well said the landlord, Whats with the wooden leg?
Well I got shot with a cannon ball lost my leg, but the wooden one is fine.
And whats with the hook?
Well I was in a swordfight and I lost my hand.
And whats with the eyepatch?
Well one day I was on deck and a seagull flew over, I looked up and it shat in my eye.
You lost your eye to birdshit said the landlord.

Well it was the first day with the hook.

Apologies, I know its not in the right thread, but thought it was funny.
When you say that "a night in the pub is going to be a pretty joyless experience", I reckon that about sums up any night out with you, regardless of CV19 or not.
That's why they shut early if he's drinking there.
My local cannot operate on the 2m or 1.5 metre rule, its staying shut and there is talk that it maybe sold to tesco's, that will go down well with our local Nisa.
My local is now a Tesco express. :(
And only Walkers or Golden Wonder. No chorizo and balsamic vinegar flavour ‘posh’ crisps. They taste like shit generally.
Agreed. I detest those poxy toytown crisps some pubs have the cheek to try to sell. Even Aldi's own brand multipacks are better.


War Hero
I don’t see it TBH. It’s not as if regular drinkers have been teetotal for three months. If I’m anything to go by, alcohol consumption has increased slightly, what with supermarket cider being cheaper than the pub. :)
Drinking a six pack of cider at home each night makes one a sad, lonely alcoholic. Drinking 6 pints down the local while engaging in casual racist, sexist and homophobic banter makes one a convivial, clubbable sort of chap.


War Hero
Exactly. I would pop down every night for an hour pre lockdown. Today it's my 109th night without a drink of any description.
I've saved a bloody fortune!


The pubs died when the puritans made them smoke free

The pubs might have died but the places where you could go and have a drink and a meal without coughing your lungs up made up for them...
If you're like me and couldn't trap your fingers in a door, then I doubt it'll be any harder than normal.
It's why I hang around mortuaries.

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