Noiticeboard -2008/2009 BFG Puntathlon Season - Team Entries

The BFG puntathlon sevens season is upon us once more. Teams entries are to be submitted to the fixtures clerk or club secretary no later than C.O.P Friday 31 October. Remember your team must include 7 named punters a qualified referee (convicted sex offender) and a maximum of three reserves. In order to keep travelling costs to a minimum the venues will, as last year, be in brothels within traditional Garrisons. The cup final and shagtathlon will be held in Paderborn. All punting expenses, travel, refreshments, grind fees etc. are to be carried by the individual team members. All fixtures are to be played on Wednesday afternoons unless otherwise agreed by: both teams and the referee, the fixtures clerk is to be informed of all changes at least one week in advance.

The rules are largely the same as last year with the following changes:

Due to last years untimely and dangerous launch, of a wailing Lithuanian gwarr prostitute into the flight-path of an aircraft attempting to land at Paderborn airport, no explosives, pyrotechnics, calcium carbide or similar compound is to be inserted into any untethered whore or team member.

At the request of the grind staff, the use of: chain-whips, pineapples, larger domestic animals, dangerous carnivores, spiky steel gauntlets, Viking helmets or rabid African moles, must be agreed by the venue management in advance and before the said item is brought onto the premises.

Due to the high incidence of frostbite last year all events will be held indoors except the traditional winter shagtathlon (socks may be worn.).

To prevent the confusion encountered last season in scrummage and gang-bang situations all team members are to have their number clearly painted on their ars'es in the team’s colours.

Due to the unnecessary bad publicity generated due to crowd trouble and the pitch invasions last year, AGC members and Mortar platoon staff may not spectate or enter the competition.

Due to the complete dominance of REME teams in recent competitions it has been decided to merge the “Gimpsex” and “Most damage done with a small co'ck” disciplines into one discipline called: “That aint right”. Suggestions for new disciplines will be welcomed by the league policy committee.


Club secretary

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