Noisy twats

Bloody plod...3 cars and a van just screamed past with all the bells and whistles going.
Now the sods are running around shouting into radios waking every fcucker up.:x
And they've now got a big old nasty looking dog with them, that's barking it's bloody head off.

It's dark O' clock you cnuts, be quiet.

(from what I can gather, it seems someone somewhere has had a kicking, and the bloke who's done it has driven off pissed and has crashed the car)
 
Ring the coppers and report a disturbance by a group of men. When they arrive, ring again and say "**** me, this looks serious, another lot just turned up". Then ring the ambos and tell them there's a confrontation and you think some **** got hurt. Better call the firies as well, can't be too careful.
 
You can ring up and honk about it if you like.

They're allowed to use them at night, but use is supposed to be proportional to the hazard and they are supposed to be considerate.
 
Heaven forbid that they turn up to try and do their job to keep you safer in your scratcher
 

Auld-Yin

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Better still, **** off to Mumsnet and do your moaning there. FFS ARRSE is turning into the place for sad moaning cnuts to post meaningless crap.

I couldn't give a tinkers **** if you have some siren and is spoiling your re-run of Strictly Come Dancing.
 
When I lived in UK they regularly screamed past my house after 21:00 hours with lights and horns blowing on their way somewhere. The road was always deserted after about 20:00 hours, so it was what we used to call play acting.

I once saw a major break in at a premises in Southall, called the OB and told them if they arrived covertly they could bag about 7 baddies, especiLy if they came from 2 directions.

The ob came up the approach road only, looking like the ******* US fleet lit up for Christmas and scared the baddies away
 

Auld-Yin

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When I lived in UK they regularly screamed past my house after 21:00 hours with lights and horns blowing on their way somewhere. The road was always deserted after about 20:00 hours, so it was what we used to call play acting.

I once saw a major break in at a premises in Southall, called the OB and told them if they arrived covertly they could bag about 7 baddies, especiLy if they came from 2 directions.

The ob came up the approach road only, looking like the ******* US fleet lit up for Christmas and scared the baddies away
To be fair, if someone told plod there were 7 baddies and you were in the one car that Despatch sent to deal with it then you would rock up with blues n twos going good style. To hell with two cops taking on seven crims!
 
To be fair, if someone told plod there were 7 baddies and you were in the one car that Despatch sent to deal with it then you would rock up with blues n twos going good style. To hell with two cops taking on seven crims!
Why would despatch (wtf does that mean anyway) sent only one car to a major break in and anyway who said only one car attended? In fact 3 cars turned up with four blokes in each car.

If I was a lawyer which I am not. Thank f uck, I might draw the conclusion that the OB was in on the crime and made sure that the criminals had time to get away. Alternatively it might have been that the OB were simple too idle to do their jobs and just enjoyed an exciting blue light joyride to the scene. Either way the crooks got away.
 

Auld-Yin

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Fair enough. Still, they had you to give your witness statement with accurate descriptions of the criminals along with descriptions of any getaway vehicles complete with registration numbers. Wouldn't take detectives long before they picked up these bad boys.
 

Ritch

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Bloody plod...3 cars and a van just screamed past with all the bells and whistles going.
Now the sods are running around shouting into radios waking every fcucker up.:x
And they've now got a big old nasty looking dog with them, that's barking it's bloody head off.

It's dark O' clock you cnuts, be quiet.

(from what I can gather, it seems someone somewhere has had a kicking, and the bloke who's done it has driven off pissed and has crashed the car)

Outrage taxi for one please.
 
I am pleased to report that I was not awoken by noisy plod.
That said I don't think the East Sussex Constabulary are even aware of the location of our village.
 
Wouldn't happen in Kent, those blokes are like ninjas. You'd probably wake up to find they've apprehended the crims, mowed your lawn, washed your car and left a full English in the oven.
 
When I lived in London the chopper would hover in the middle of the night while the preverts on board shone lights into our bedroom windows.

I live a mile north of Heathrow and almost directly under the helicopter route around the airport. We get a constant stream of choppers, and I use the word in both descriptive and derogatory senses of the meaning, flying around our ears.

A regular visitor is the police helicopter and they don't just fly past. They hang around for considerable amounts of time hovering at a fairly low height, probably a couple of hundred feet and they do it at all hours but particularly between midnight and 4am.

Part of me thinks it's a necessary thing to keep us safe in our beds but another part of me especially after a lengthy period of sleep deprivation wonders if there aren't any coppers around who could intervene on the ground and do it more quietly.
 
Local chav estate had a stabbing the other day but at least it was only a mile from the local A&E.
Op Trident will be investigating and probably down to gangs/drugs or both!
 
Wouldn't happen in Kent, those blokes are like ninjas. You'd probably wake up to find they've apprehended the crims, mowed your lawn, washed your car and left a full English in the oven.
Bit early in the day to be on the sauce, isn't it? ;)
 
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