Noisy Sex,,Be warned...

#2
Big deal, I've had Environmental Health called on me loads of times for noisy shagging. I had one of the letters hanging on my wall until the missus made me take it down - complete sense of humour failure because she hadn't been involved. Women, eh?
 
#3
Big deal, I've had Environmental Health called on me loads of times for noisy shagging. I had one of the letters hanging on my wall until the missus made me take it down - complete sense of humour failure because she hadn't been involved. Women, eh?
I'm not sure noisy wanking constitutes noisy sex.
 
#6
What a boring cunt this tit is, he should've been banging on the walls telling her to give it socks, whilst wanking like a chimpanzee.
 

CplFoodspoiler

War Hero
Book Reviewer
#7
Sounds more like the miserable git who did the recording was sucking on a bunch of sour grapes. He said it kept him UP all night. As far as I'm concerned that's a bonus! I have to rely on little blue pills to have that effect. Then went on to say the racket went on for an hour, that's not all night. sounds like a Johnny no Mate.
 
#9
I,d be screaming my support while pulling my pudd'n like a demented frustrated rapist.
 
#11
I loved hearing my neighbour screaming her head off, I just wished that she invited me over to partake with her and her girlfriend. Only down side was that after a heavy session my knob was as raw as fuck!!!
 
#12
My Mrs always screems when I'm shagging.


Its MY dog!
 
#13
Perhaps she was screaming because he was just doing the manly thing of wiping his cock on the curtains.
 
#16
Transcript of tape through my bedroom wall:
Male voice: "Please, oh please, it's been ages"
Female voice " Go away, it was only 2 months ago and I'm not in the mood"
Male voice: "Oh, please, pretty please, look - it's all big and ready"
Female voice: "Put it away, I'm tired"
(Continues in similar vein for 10 minutes then the foreplay ends)
Female voice "Oh, go on then. Anything for a bit of peace and quiet"
Male voice " grunt, grunt ohhh-ahhh (similar noises for about 35 seconds) aaaahhhhhhhhhhh!"
Female voice "hmmm, not too bad, can I have a cuddle now?"
Male voice "Shut up and go to sleep, I thought you were tired?"
(No other noises were heard for the rest of the night - tape ends)
 
#17
Transcript of tape through my bedroom wall:
Male voice: "Please, oh please, it's been ages"
Female voice " Go away, it was only 2 months ago and I'm not in the mood"
Male voice: "Oh, please, pretty please, look - it's all big and ready"
Female voice: "Put it away, I'm tired"
(Continues in similar vein for 10 minutes then the foreplay ends)
Female voice "Oh, go on then. Anything for a bit of peace and quiet"
Male voice " grunt, grunt ohhh-ahhh (similar noises for about 35 seconds) aaaahhhhhhhhhhh!"
Female voice "hmmm, not too bad, can I have a cuddle now?"
Male voice "Shut up and go to sleep, I thought you were tired?"
(No other noises were heard for the rest of the night - tape ends)
You're definitely not my neighbour,the pleading goes on for a lot fucking longer than 10 minutes,and the sex for a lot less than 35 seconds.
 

phil245

LE
Book Reviewer
#18
Me and my wife used to use the Doggy position a lot, I would sit up and beg and she would roll over and play dead.
 
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