No use to Man or Beast,- worst Inventions

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Aleegee1698

Guest
Is your Shed/Garage/Cellar full of things that humanity could have done without? Are your drawers and cupboards bursting at the seams with all those "gadgets" that some sad ****** bought you for Crimbo? In order of seniority:

1) Toilet-roll cosy,..............normally knitted and for some very strange reason, with a Doll on top, why oh why, is it to keep the paper warm, or keep it piss-splash free?

2) Yes, this was the next obvious choice, the Toilet-lid furry cover, no explanation available

3) The light-bulb inside a fridge, it only switches on when you open the door, and I already have a light in the kitchen

4) The OAP "One foot Slipper" (or whatever its called), **** me, those OAPs have enough trouble walking as it is let alone having both feet in one slipper

5) "The Lunar Biro" a pen that is so efficient, you can write letters home whilst visiting the Moon, definately something that everyone needs

6) Remote-controlled In-car entertainment systems, probably caused more accidents looking for the ******* remote than smoking, eating, drinking and texting at the wheel. How lazy can you get?

7) The Zeppelin, when used as a Bomber as in WW1, not much chance really of returning home from that Sortie

8 ) Sorry, mentioned this elsewhere, but its got to be the "Leaf-Blower", must have been invented by a "neighbour from Hell" and purposely used to further annoy neighbours by making noise and blowing his shit into their gardens

9) Alcohol-Free Beer, a bit like having a **** with a condom, er,....... no, you get the jist

10) "Book-reading mirror", a device with a prism mirror for people who only lay on one side whilst reading, in order to read the left and right page without moving the book (OK, yes, I did just make that up)

Thats my ten for the week.........
 

JoeCivvie

ADC
RIP
Is your Shed/Garage/Cellar full of things that humanity could have done without? Are your drawers and cupboards bursting at the seams with all those "gadgets" that some sad ****** bought you for Crimbo? In order of seniority:



4) The OAP "One foot Slipper" (or whatever its called), **** me, those OAPs have enough trouble walking as it is let alone having both feet in one slipper

That's why there are so many broken hips amongst the over 60's - the adverts com eon and they try to hop to the kitchen to put the kettle on - CRASH!


And you can add to that list anything made by K-Tel or Ronco
 
B

Boozy

Guest
those snuggie blanket things with arms are a pretty big moneyspinning con.

might as well get an old ordinary blanket and cut a hole in the middle, wear as a poncho et voila a cheap alternative...

this argument they have on their adverts about your hands being free because of the sleeves is balls - you'd have to be pretty fcuking lazy to be unable to stick your arm out from under it to switch the tv over/drink your tea. And if you're worried about cold arms, try a bloody jumper or long sleeved top!
 
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gordon_brown_thatcher_sex_doll.jpg
 

ancienturion

LE
Book Reviewer
All a bit silly really because everyone knows that everything in a shed is useful (or may be one day).
 

jim24

LE
Book Reviewer
Anything designed by that twat Dyson, £300 for piss poor quality plastic shite
 
C

Crio

Guest
My Mother-in-law is getting one of these for Christmas. Every year.

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That's right. It's an "Avacado Saver". :slow:
 
RAF Regiment.....what were they invented for?

So everyone in the Army could have somebody they could pretend they could look down on.

A minor part of their raison d'être, perhaps, but a significant morale booster for the average squaddie.
 

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