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No really, if you had to fuck a guy ....

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Juan_Ramirez_III, Nov 7, 2010.

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  1. Top night out last night, when we burned out and town subsequently emptied we all ended up hunched round a table in a Thai restaurant in Chinatown. A strange cocaine fuelled question came up, namely, if you had to fuck a bloke who would it be ? It arose from a discussion about Tarantino films and his validity as a contributory factor in the ongoing development of original and quality films.

    The main protagonists assertion that he would 'fuck Elvis' in the pivotal classic True Romance raised a few eyebrows but I settled on Benicio Del Toro, if I had to be positively fucked without argument by a male it would be by that bull like thespian, I couldn't think of a better way to be sodomised than by a 6" Puerto Rican with tobacco stained fingers.

    Other suggestions were alarmingly, 'Shane Richie' because he could make you laugh, 'Tom Sizemore' because apparently it (and I quote) 'wouldn't make you gay as he always plays meatheads' and my brother said my Uncle Shaun as he is that much of a colossus he wouldn't feel you fucking him.

    Bear in mind I was out with a professional boxer, 2 lunatics and a cunt struck ex para.

    If push came to shove who's back box would you plunder ?
  2. Yours judgin by how snugly that finger fits
  3. Tony Blair. To fucking death.
  4. [​IMG]

    Brad Pitt (fight club), laters, I feel weird.
  5. You shouldn't, I'd fuck his mouth at gunpoint
  6. Where's the romance in that ? I got dicked for assisting on a cadet weekend once, the little cherubs were all packed into a troop shelter where they slept, changed, crashed out and ate from and within 48 hours I was comfortably aware that teenage boys and girls share similar arseholes, unplucked, slightly stained and permanently twitching
  7. Matt Damon;
    and the guy in my Tai Chi class whom I stand behind and focus in on his tight bum and breathe...
  8. Watched The Dirty Dozen earlier. Lee Marvin if I really had to. He was that much of a man's man that I think he would just shrug it off.
    " 'Tis but a flesh wound." Kind of thing.
  9. Would you, as a Uniformed Flunkey, at a VIP Dinner Evening, stand behind my Lord Mandelson's chair... go over to my Lord, and whisper in his ear... "My Lord, would you like me to push your stool in....??"
  10. Quality ! :) I used to finger my bum in the bath imagining Hanibal Smith kissing my neck whilst the Face sucked my perineum
  11. Raoul. He's a lovely chap and does such a good job bringing me my g&t and dressing gown.
  12. I bet the guy in the Tai Chi class is chuffed.
  13. I'd induct BA Barracus into the mile high club, after a glass of laced milk he's anyones.
    Afterwards you could snigger into your drink and patronise the stewardess in 1st class safe in the knowledge he's stowed in the cargo hold with only a broken bottom and a couple of refugees for company.
  14. JR great minds think alike as i have debated this myself, could i ever find myself sticking it to another male? As much as i like trannies they dont (usually) look like blokes. After much thinking and soul searching i found it would have to be a feminine type who i could beat up if i felt the need anything more macho would not be to my taste and the specimen i found was a porn star called Jesse Starr. I could see myself ramming his pucker while spitting on his back and calling him a dirty smack addicted faggot bottom slut.
  15. I like it going down the Saudi Prince route, I'm not gay but my man servant is, watch whilst I knock fuck out of him in a lift.