Nipping it in the bud

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by the_rigger, Jan 16, 2006.

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  1. There is a lot of hooha in the press about yobs and anti social behaviour, with many people believing that national service is answer. However I believe that this is closing the door after the horse has bolted.
    If a bloke is an 18 year old yob and he does national service, all that means is that when he goes back to civi strasse 18 months later, he'll just be able to out run the fuzz easier.
    So bearing in mind that they say "Give me a boy until the age of 7, and I will give you the man" (I think it was a famous quote by Michael Jackson), I believe that a form of education based on the army should be introduced from day care onwards.
    I am currently formulating a plan to present to the government, but I have started making suggestions at the day care my 15 month old boy goes to.
    I have successfully got them to implement the following ideas-
    1. Afternoon naps can only be taken in the backs of locable vehicles.
    2. Toys to be replaced with 16 ounce milling gloves (the boy looks so cute with gloves up to his armpits, and the old biddies in the supermarket love a nipper with a black eye).
    3. Basic role playing games where the kids learn about freindship by sharing a yellow handbag, fighting eachother and then bezzering to make up.
    4. Basic sports which is really just an extended nap time on wednesday afternoon.
    5. No nappy changes to help induce double legging

    Obviously I am just a first time dad, so there may be better ways to get the little scamps in order. Any suggestions will be greatly received.
     
  2. 307

    307 War Hero

    The little red and yellow plastic cars, trailers, trikes etc. must be first paraded every playtime before use. When they do the register all the youths should be formed up in 3 ranks to answer their names.
     
  3. I've been researching local creches for my first (oh god it's getting close) and found one which I believe might take on some good ideas.

    When I asked what kind of exercise they get, the old woman manager type responded:

    "They go outside twice a day for an hour at a time. It helps them sleep better".

    I must be getting old and weak because I said: "What do they do when it's cold and raining?"

    "They go outside anyway".

    I was really impressed.
     
  4. Can I suggest:

    Children

    as a starter for 10. It certainly helped me with my kids.