Framework Document For the Peace The Agreement After the meetings and talks, which lasted for over two ******* years, the parties finally signed the following agreement. THE LOYALISTS agreed to the following: 1. Not to grow long sideburns and have 1970s hairstyles. 2. Not to wear any sunglasses even when it is raining. 3. Not to run any dodgy video shop rackets. 4. Not support Rangers and follow Linfield. 5. Leave kerbstones free from paint. 6. Not let 5 year olds draw their murals. 7. Stop marching and dressing up like Mr Ben on 12th July. 8. Get a proper job and not join the Police. 9. Stop getting caught so easily for terrorist offences. 10. Not to use Meccano sets for making bombs. THE REPUBLICANS agreed to the following: 1. To stop saying "this island of Ireland" all the time. 2. Dressing like tramps and pleading hard up. 3. Use public transport instead of hijacking and burning it. 4. Not to have anniversaries about times they had their arses kicked. 5. Talk ******* English. 6. Admit that Martin Meguiness is a ******* ******. 7. Only go to a funeral if it close family. 8. Telephone the police when there is a bomb not the Irish News. 9. Stop ******* off to America every five minutes. THE ALLIANCE PARTY agree to the following: 1. Everything as they did not want to upset anybody. Dr IAN PAISELEY agreed to the following: 1. **** all. THE WOMENS COALITION agreed to the following: 1. To go home and get the tea on.