News from the front

[Ventress]

The first Camp News sheet as arrived, it seems from 23 Pie and Ear Regt.

Highlights:

The Unit is drinking the prescribed 8l a day, even if Officers and WOs have to lessen their tea intake.

Anyone with toilet roll, NBC kit, water should contact the editor.

Young driver found dead and emaciated after failing to know how to open his 24 hour ration packs.

Saddam has called for all Iraqi women to shave their nether regions. Blairwitch has accused the muslim world of taking the anti-bush campaign to far.

No one is call the choggies- choggies. And there will be  a messing meeting in the choggie shop cafe at 2030hrs.

All true and I await the next issue with bated breath- sounds like GW1, but with more chance of seeing an Iraqi.

 

[boots_fit]

Just heard from a mate in Kuwait - he's sleeping in a hanger with 2,500 other people. Says the snoring is something to behold!!

He went down with a gastro illness after 2 days so has been hanging out of his arrse since then! Especially as the weather is pretty scorching!

Oh, and by the way, inexperienced J1 types in the UK NCHQ seem to be struggling to cope with the current influx of reservists and their associated issues...surely they must have seen that one coming!?

 

[The Snob]

Dear All,

I can't even begin to explain how utterly appallingly dreadful it is here. Hundreds of loggies (all of whom seem to have desert kit, we note, and some even have name tags in Arabic!) strolling about giving it big arms, while the fighters are all stuck in green kit, being herded about Camp Rhino or similar.

Never mind, dear reader, because we'll be off soon, away from the mindless idiots who believe that 'battlefield discipline' means wearing your beret AT ALL TIMES.

As my USMC friends would say - 'Gung ho, gung ho, gung ho - pray for war!'

Or something...

 

[Mr Happy]

Yes but if the loggies only had the green kit then the press would get a hold of the problem...  Far better to have the teeth chaps in green well away from the press and all the loggies looking smart  

 

[GreenGoddess]

Finally here.

Its total crap, No dessys, 4 sets of goggles between 10 of us.

No tentage for accommodation.

Eating US cold rations.

God help us if we are tasked to do anything  .

 

[PartTimePongo]

Chin up GG .......

..and don't forget to spread the Arrse word

That nice Mr. Hoon says you've got everything you need...

 

[Toptotty]

Glad to see you can still all get to an internet machine.  keep up the good work and good luck!

 

[GreenGoddess]

Hi

If anything things are getting worse out here.

Still lacking in adequate tentage, fuel is now becoming a problem.

The local USMC has now placed reinforced guards on all the there supplies so we are finding problems in acquiring kit.

Biggest laugh so far is our AS 90s have pitched up, but the rounds are lost somewhere in the port or still at sea.

As for internet access, that’s easy the yanks have a number of internet cafes in the field!!!