New Virus Thing

Discussion in 'Professionally Qualified, RAMC and QARANC' started by The_Snail, Jan 15, 2008.

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  1. I will admit to manflu.

    I will admit to puking and having the shites.

    I will admit to having a week off work because feck me, I tried the 24hrs off with just drinking council pop, and not eating. I don't need that. My BMI is 18.

    I will admit to nearly being admitted to hozzy.

    When does it stop?

    I am bored with it now, it is stopping me watching Shameless.
  2. You shouldnt have swallowed ;-)
  3. I'm not that ill enough to call you a wanker xxxx
  4. What I do in my own time is my business :p
  5. Stop it you big girl.

    I'm serious for once.
  6. So you are looking for sympathy is that it? None here. :p
  7. I don't want sympathy. I want a magic cure, and quickly. My BMI is dropping by the minute, trust me on this.

    Honestly though, it's like my body is not listening to my head:

    Flowers, (I like freesias) on my demise, may be sent to Bigbird67.

    Goodbye cruel world, I'm off to either die or watch Jeremy Kyle in my scanties.
  8. Can I have your dog and your house?

    edited to add : I don't want your car - if I need a skip I'll hire one.
  9. From someone medical, I expected better.

    In fact, feck it, the last sympathy I got off you was when you let Mrs Toppers hold my hair out of my own sick, and you laughed like a twat, whilst Cider Glider shat in my kitchen sink.

    Was that really last Christmas?
  10. and why is Lucozade sticky?
  11. YOU would expect sympathy from ME? You really are ill then. The sympathy was for Mrs Toppers who cleared up your sick, and for your dog (what dawg?) who ran away from your bed.

    This doesn't tell us who is in your will, and what do they get?
  12. To Bootiful, I leave my belly
    To Bigburd I leave Flash the Provost and choclit crispies
    Drumstick lollies to all
    To Sniffy, Aniseed Balls
    To Toppers, the gardener and all bills (you can have the fecking house, I care not - look at the clip of the carpet in the living room)
    To Fluffybunny: the Old Charm stuff (step away Toppers it cost me a fortune and I've "ruined" it.
    To Mr Slug: Go on, have the dog back, if you can catch the fecker and find him. Arr arrr.

    Juniorslug gets the rest. Unless MDN can auction it off and get some pennies.

    P.S. It's all ruined. Those M&S couches can tell a story or seven!
  13. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Have you got a playstation?
  14. I used to.

    When I was about 23. A very long time ago.

    Don't start me.

    My abs are ace though. I have a belly like a biafran (shut up Bigbird). The only feeling I can relate this to is when I had D&V in Basra. I thought I was dying there as well. Thank goodness they had that little wee thing next to the shitter in the portaloos. Puking and choclit drops at the same time.

    Can I just have a little bit of sympathy please?