New mum and baby in hospital wot pressie to send

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by thegimp, Mar 20, 2008.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Mates other half has just dropped a sprog, I say dropped a sprog, it can through the sun roof

    I'm away but want to send something to the hospital (Mum will be staying in a couple of days)

    Flowers are out due to hospital rules

    I thought some choccies and a DPM romper suit (spud will be a royal marine so may as well get used to the green suit) :D

    Any thoughts please

    also posted this in the other half forum but need a snappy response
     
  2. Get her a bus ticket home, your mates tea's not going to cook itself is it?
    Jack cow!
     
  3. Given it came out via the sun roof and not cnutwards, the usual present of a small rubber mallett to knock the ravaged flange back into some sort of shape for future access is not appropriate.

    Accordingly, she can now concentrate on getting her figure back, pronto. I'd suggest a sit-up mat, plus some towels in case the stitches burst.
     
  4. get a basket of smellies for mum and a nice little outfit for baby. Tip get 3-6 months size as new mums get overrun with 0-3 months and they dont get to wear half of it as they grow so quick!
     
  5. Chest rigging to accompany the romper suit and Farsai for tots.
     
  6. Matching butt-plugs for mum and sprog.
     
  7. do not get her choccies she will be paranoid about snapping back to pre preggars shape without getting them!
     
  8. A time-share villa in Portugal?
     
  9. Box of Condom's :? ....... Oh and some of those mucky DvD's for a few days till it heals up :D
     
  10. Wrap a tin of SLIMFAST powder up to look like a christmas Cracker and see the delight in her eyes before she opens it. Afterwards, hire a good divorce lawyer. It worked for me!!
     
  11. I bought my wife a new dyson when she had our second.
     
  12. Dont think you have got the hang of this thread have you !
     
  13. Still, it was a nice thought.

    Why not give her a brochure on 4x4 cars and a Nectar card, best to help her to plan for the mindless years of being a soccer mommy that lie ahead, and it won't cost you a penny.
     
  14. A crocodile...

    Hat coat, taxi...