New girlfriend

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by Bollock-chops, Sep 7, 2013.

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  1. I met a beautiful Dutch girl with inflatable shoes.
    I rang for a date tonight, apparently she's popped her clogs. :-(

    Posted from the ARRSE Mobile app (iOS or Android)
    • Like Like x 6
  2. Porridge_gun

    Porridge_gun LE Good Egg (charities)

    The only thing that should pop is your head after being inflated to 1700 psi with helium for telling such a crap gag.
    • Like Like x 4
  3. That made me smile.

    (Not very much, admittedly)
    • Like Like x 1
  4. She had to go and lie down for a bit after I told her there was a b and q in St Helens

    Posted from the ARRSE Mobile app (iOS or Android)
  5. Its no wonder I pissed on you with jokes like that.
    • Like Like x 1
  6. It reminds me of the story about the inflatable boy who went to his inflatable school with the inflatable kids and teachers, with a pin!

    The headmaster gave him a stern lecture "You've let me down, you've let the school down and worst of all you've let yourself down".
    • Like Like x 4
  7. Q: What do you call a virgin in Dutch?

    A: Gootentight.
  8. What happens on tour stays on tour??

    You cunt ;-)