neighbour not playing ball


ok guys help needed. I have a neighbour that i have had to talk to on a number of occasions about this late night partys etc etc.He also thinks a one way system is not one way to him but two ways!!!One way system in place due to narrow roads and a school.

i gave him the option to toe the line or face action threw the channels..He said and i quote "ok you can try,whatever"......almost put him threw his wall into my front room but am not going to get draged into such a messy mess....

Must also add I have toddler that is usualy in bed by 1830.

Any advice or past expereinces please....

And i shall be paying a visit to familys officer tomoz.I have kept diary of events and have a third party witness.sort of.
Make an anonymous phone call from a pay phone to the cops that drugs are being 'served' at said party. Then sit back with a video camera and tape the whole thing.

Post tape on youtube and put link here. Or you could firebomb his house. Worked with my last neighbour.


i love your style....are you getting help? if so can you forward the details as i need some....will take your ideas into consideration...i like them lots


Talk to the local plod, and keep a diary of whats going on, then bust ur chav neighbour
Do they have kids? If so, do a 'Resevoir dogs' sketch on them. I'm sure he'll play ball once you post the nippers ear lug to him.

Any pets? Get all 'Apocolypse Now' on them.

Finish off with a 'Pulp Fiction basement' scene on his missus.

Failing that, man the fuck up and chin the cunt.


ah there you go,no they dont have kids,or pets .....and as i said before not getting involved in messy a mess to clean up,and make my point heard.
newlynpirate said:
ah there you go,no they dont have kids,or pets .....and as i said before not getting involved in messy a mess to clean up,and make my point heard.

If youre not into the physical thing, how about a couple of carefully placed booby traps?

Out of interest, not that it should make a difference, what ranks are he and you?

If you'd rather not say, just indicate if he is higher lower or the same.
I take it your not in his CoC?

Route to go; Families Officer>His CoC/Your CoC.

To be honest, if your FO is any good, that's all it will take.

I'd be suprised if the little shite doesn't play ball once the system gets involved.

If he is doing what you say, he is breaking his MQ contract.
Long course you say?

I'll bet it wont be good for him if he gets turfed out his MQ for being a tit.

FO should do the trick. Crusty old LE ex QM/RSMs usually have a knack with diplomacy. ;)
I gather this is in MOD Accommodation.

In Civvy street these muppets are usually up to no good one way or another. I had loads of mither with one a couple of years back. Crowds of folk coming round dealing drugs at all hours. A steady stream of tip offs to plod soon screwed his income. No Income = no money for rent = Big fat FO from the land lord. Problem solved!

Good luck!


War Hero
Regardless of whether this is MOD quarters the local authority can deal with noise pollution, most take it pretty seriously these days, so it would be worth giving them a call.

One way street thing, I'd say video him and then report it to plod proviging the evidence.


neighbour well kicked into touch......the F.O went o town on the muppets and good prevailed.................thanks for all your info girls and guys and thats 1-0 to the goodies..................goody goody gum drops ( for the old and bold)....
Have they moved your neighbour or is that the next step?

IS Ski Geek

War Hero
Had the same issue at my place. Had a word with him but he did not want to listen. Informed the family office, who then proceeded to talk to him. (3am every day of the week was begining to take the piss).

The young lad took offence to his talking to and decided to sign off.

9 months later and life is heaven and no loss to the army either.


Also had the same problem, pitty his missus left him and he had to move back into the block. i dont think he understood what the OMO in the window was when he returned from exercise......

edited because i'm a mong

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