Need Help "House Clearing"

A

Aleegee1698

Guest
#1
Landed a top contract 3 months ago for a total refurb of a 265m² 1930s 3-storey Villa in the area. My Clients bought the property by "Zwangsversteigerung" (Involuntary auctioning by the Bank) and got it for a steal. Mind you, you are not allowed to view the interior during a "Zwangsversteigerung" so God knows what awaits us.

However, that is not the problem, the problem is that the former owners refuse to leave the property, and this can go through many court hearings before they are finally evicted, at worst, taking upto 2 years.

The place has a massive 40m² Balcony, so I was just wondering if there were any ex Them on here who would like to earn a few quid on the side and "help the occupants leave".

Failing that, any other (il)legal ideas?
 
#2
Any kids in there? If not, CS through the air vents. You can buy it online. Thats if you want the softly softly approach, failing that Chuck Norris the front door and windmill the fuckers with a rounders bat, or 4D Maglite
 
#4
OC gas squirted through the keyhole or under the doors. Doesn't require much and won't leave the crystalline residue CS and CN does.
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#5
My mate Nadia uses that expression. Like "Sorry, cant make it Duke. My Clients need me to be at the City Airport for a hop to Paris. Call you laters babes, yah".

Nadia is a top-end hooker. And she capitalises the 'M' and the 'C' of My Clients. Just like you.

So, now that we have established the fact that you are a hooker, kneel down and open your mouth.
 
A

Aleegee1698

Guest
#6
My mate Nadia uses that expression. Like "Sorry, cant make it Duke. My Clients need me to be at the City Airport for a hop to Paris. Call you laters babes, yah".

Nadia is a top-end hooker. And she capitalises the 'M' and the 'C' of My Clients. Just like you.

So, now that we have established the fact that you are a hooker, kneel down and open your mouth.
FFS, outed again, and theres me doing my best to portray a common General Builder, Guv.
 
#8
Landed a top contract 3 months ago for a total refurb of a 265m² 1930s 3-storey Villa in the area. My Clients bought the property by "Zwangsversteigerung" (Involuntary auctioning by the Bank) and got it for a steal. Mind you, you are not allowed to view the interior during a "Zwangsversteigerung" so God knows what awaits us.

However, that is not the problem, the problem is that the former owners refuse to leave the property, and this can go through many court hearings before they are finally evicted, at worst, taking upto 2 years.

The place has a massive 40m² Balcony, so I was just wondering if there were any ex Them on here who would like to earn a few quid on the side and "help the occupants leave".

Failing that, any other (il)legal ideas?
Easy....6 blokes, 6 baseball bats, 6 balaclava masks, oh and about 6 minutes to clear the fuckers out. Simples!!!!!
 
#11
Writing juden on the door used to work...On second thoughts write "Greeks live here". In German obviously.
 
#17
This thread is very similar to getting the pikey's out of the place they call a 'safe haven' in Basildon Essex.

My favourite idea was to catapult dead, rotten, disease ridden cows over the wall; give it a few days and then simply move in and do the clearance.
 
#18
Poison the water supply.
Cut off the water supply.
Cut the power.
Deliver pizza spiked with 'E'
Send round diseased hooker - wait for them to die of AIDs.
Hungry rabid dog - kick it in the balls, lob it in the premises and video the fun.
Let me move in next door.
Shite in the air vents.
Block the air vents and kill them with CO poisoning.
Break in whilst they are asleep and smash their heads in with a cricket bat.

Wait til I've got some leave and I'll go in naked; that'll soon have the fuckers out or dying laughing.
 
#19
Landed a top contract 3 months ago for a total refurb of a 265m² 1930s 3-storey Villa in the area. My Clients bought the property by "Zwangsversteigerung" (Involuntary auctioning by the Bank) and got it for a steal. Mind you, you are not allowed to view the interior during a "Zwangsversteigerung" so God knows what awaits us.

However, that is not the problem, the problem is that the former owners refuse to leave the property, and this can go through many court hearings before they are finally evicted, at worst, taking upto 2 years.

The place has a massive 40m² Balcony, so I was just wondering if there were any ex Them on here who would like to earn a few quid on the side and "help the occupants leave".

Failing that, any other (il)legal ideas?
Flash Bang through the front door [nob on the balcony bit they will be waiting for that]
then one in the gut one in the head
 
#20
FFS, outed again, and theres me doing my best to portray a common General Builder, Guv.
A builder? How would Fred West deal with such a problem?
 

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