Need A Main Course

Blokes and bints of ARRSE, I happen to be entertaining soon and am required to cook to an excellent standard a 3 courser.

I have the starter, which is mussels in coconut broth and the sweet which is banana and passion fruit souffle. What I am struggling with is the main course. A perfectly cooked steak with vine tomatoes is my very last resort, however, the person I am entertaining is not a fan of steak (I know, I know, wtf), but there's no one who doesn't appreciate a perfect steak, right? (minus vegetabalists of course) Preferably not fish, but its not out of the picture.

I turn to the vast amount of knowledge held by those on ARRSE in my time of need. Lads I'm looking to impress, so egg banjos are a no.


Book Reviewer
Not a fan of steak?! You want to start choosing your company a bit more carefully.

What Jarrod said, a nice ghoulash always hits the spot and sticks to the ribs. Pumpkin stew served as a side.


A French dressed rack of lamb with herb crust, buttered parsley new potatoes and steamed veg.

Easy to cook, looks like you have put a bit of effort in and tastes great. Just don't roast it to a cinder.


Chicken thighs or fillets, cooked over roasted mediteraean (sp) veg. Easy one to bung in the oven whilst you're enjoying the starter.

Pan fry the chicken first to get a crispy skin, bung in as much or little chilli flakes as you want to make the dish spicy enough


Book Reviewer
How about a prawn and chilli stir fry - easy quick and goes with the other two courses

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Morocan style lamb.

One lamp leg, cover in a rather nice butter, parika, garlic, etc mix. Then cook in oven. Mega hot to start with, to burn the butter (it tastes delicious) and then down to a low temp to slow cook it.

Serve with tatties (thrown in later to the same dish) and/or rosemary and thyme bread. Ripped apart not cut. You can dip the bread in the juices at the bottom of the pan too... yum.

let us know if you want the full recipe, or if you search the forum (aroud christmas last year) i posted it for someone else.
Armour Plated Roast, aka Beef Wellington. It's steak, only different. If she complains, **** her off.
3 courses.... keep it light.

King prawn risotto hits the spot.

If you've got a Farmfoods freezer shop, they have the best king prawns we've ever tasted, get the raw frozen ones.

Take a mug of risotto rice, add a tbsp of olive oil and 4 spring onions (finely chopped) and fry gently for a few minutes, I tend to use a wok, seems to work best.

Add a glass of white wine and simmer till almost absorbed.

Have a pan of simmering stock (either real chicken stock or a MP White stock pot, plus a pinch of saffron) about 2 1/2 mugfuls close by.

Add about half, then stir occaisonally until almost absorbed, then add a ladle full at a time until the rice is almost tender, with almost no liquid left.

Put a plate on top to seal it, then start to cook the defrosted prawns in a little olive oil, garlic optional.

Fry hard on one side until pink with a little brown, then turn over for a few minutes on the other side.

Plate up the risotto, then place the prawns on top, I usually put on 8- 10 each depending on size.

You can add a few snipped up porcini mushrooms into the stock for extra flavour.

You MUST stir on a regular basis, if the rice sticks, it's difficult to repair the dish.
Two suggestions based on your planned starter and afters, green Thai chicken curry or Barbadian Fowl Down in Rice. Plenty of recipes around, I'll give copies of mine if needed.
The souffle sounds like a hassle.

If you are cooking to impress a woman and don't want to overfill her... a real passion killer.... how about a granita?

3 hours before.....

Take 2 large oranges

1 ripe mango

1 lemon

4oz of sugar

8 fluid oz/ 250ml of water.

Carefully take the rind off the lemon and 1 orange without including the pith, cut the oranges and lemon in half and squeeze out the juice, run a knife from top to bottom on the mango, halfs, quarters then eighths seems to be the easiest way to peel them, then run a knife along the skin to get at the flesh.

Whizz or mash with a fork and add to the juice.

Take the water, add the sugar and simmer for 10 minutes to make the syrup then allow to cool.

Take the zest, cut into strips and throw in boilng water for 2 seconds, drain and refresh under cold water.

Add half to the juice, wrap the rest in clingfilm and put in the fridge for garnish.

Mix the cool syrup and fruit juice in a plastic container and put in the freezer, taking out every 30 minutes to stir.

If it goes beyond a stiff slurry, put in the fridge to soften off a little.

Serve in your best large wine glasses, garnished with the rest of the zest and perhaps some nice Italian dessert biscuits or wafers.
If your cooking to impress a woman let me give you a tip,

She won't be!

They are shallow beasts who want a champagne lifestyle on your beer wages.

You want to impress her, take her out and pay for it.