Need a cheer up or fuke orf.

#1
It's an old fuckers funeral on Wednesday, got a lot of grit round here thanks to the fucking dust carts. Tried the Ex-shag's, that went down like she did. Fucking didn't.

Bit of NAAFI love or a simple fuck off wouldn't go amiss.

Thanks, fuckers!
 
#5
Nan the bar girl says cheer up and "why he no call me?"
 
#8
Fucked if I'm calling Thailand fella, I could be talking to anything, like you, over there.
Then you would be improving yourself. And the number I gave you is not in Thailand you gibbon, its in Vietnam. My location might have given you a clue, likewise the address I posted for the bar that she works in. Now FUCK OFF, grief whore and stop looking for sympathy.
 
#9
Cremation or burial?

If it's cremation, make sure you've some matches and firelighters to hand to ensure that things go smoothly. No point in wasting the heat, so take some sausages and kebabs.

If it's burial, it's tactful to hide your fishing tackle as you gather worms.
 
#11
#12
It's an old fuckers funeral on Wednesday, got a lot of grit round here thanks to the fucking dust carts. Tried the Ex-shag's, that went down like she did. Fucking didn't.

Bit of NAAFI love or a simple fuck off wouldn't go amiss.

Thanks, fuckers!
Dust cart my fucking arrse! You're a big blubbing girl who needs to man-up, tool-up and get as many post-funeral blow-jobs as possible.

Depressed sobbing chicks are crying out for love. Suppply and demand baby, supply and demand :nod:
 
#13
If it's a cremation, make sure you switch off your mobile, don't want 'Take That' Relight My Fire going off at the wrong time now do you?! :p
 
#14
If it's a cremation, make sure you switch off your mobile, don't want 'Take That' Relight My Fire going off at the wrong time now do you?! :p
Fuck that - play Elvis; 'Return To Sender' on his way to smokesville normally raises a chuckle! :) Now cheer up and fuck off yer twat! :)
 
M

Mark The Convict

Guest
#16
You're in the money if you know any necrophiliacs - just dig him up and rent his arse to them. It's not as though anyone will question his masculinity.
 

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