Nearly caused a crash!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Biped, Nov 9, 2007.

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  1. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    I was driving along a fairly narrow road on an industrial estate in town the other day, and I'm driving past parked traffic on the left (already passed 100yds worth of them), thus leaving no room for oncoming traffic to get past. A bit further down the road (about 75 yards) the parked traffic ends, and two cars can pass again.

    I was doing about 25mph when this fat cnut in a Nissan comes barrelling towards me just as I'm getting to the bit where two cars can pass, but I've got knowhere to go if he continues.

    He's doing around 40mph and shows no sign of slowing, even though he can see I'm nearly through, and he's had a good 7-8 seconds to take on board the traffic situation, so I thinks to myself "fcuk it, I'm not stopping the vehicle because then one of us will have to reverse, and a few more feet and he'll be able to get past.

    Now this fat cnut has got a car full of kids, and at the last, last moment, just as I'm getting to the passable bit, he slams on his anchor, screeches to a halt and waves his hands around in the windscreen as if I'm the one who is in the wrong.

    Suffice to say, I carried on cruising past, but lowered my window, smiled, and flipped him the bird. At the moment of passing, I honestly thought, from the coolour of his face, and the strangled way in which he screamed "CNUT!" at me, that he might have a cardiac arrest.

    I was desperately hoping that he would turn his car around and come after me, but he didn't, so I missed out on giving him a good shoeing. Proper shame really.

    Anyone else had something like this? :D
  2. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    Regularly some cnut on the wrong side of the road flips the bird at me!
  3. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Me too, but this was a little simpler. When I moved over to the other side of the STRAIGHT road to pass the traffic, there was NO oncoming traffic and the road was clear. He hoved into view WHILST I was passing the parked traffic!! 8O

    Edited to add: at all other times I assiduously stick to my lane, not even cutting the lines going around bends.
  4. Flips the bird????
  5. just moved from scotland to the saff, and the way people drive here is amazing the other day a woman with a car full of sprogs was screaming out of a cul de sac while i was crossing the road taking my son to school, i shiped me pants and i think she did when she realised i wasnt going to move. however it hasnt changed the drive like lunatics, why!
  6. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

  7. Cheers! :oops:
  8. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    Yeah flips the bird, there I am screaming car load of screaming kids, exercising my right of way and some old git drives straight at me, caused me to bustabloodvessel!
  9. Nothing wrong with driving with a touch of agression behind the wheel, me old china.

    Besides, how are you to get from one side of the Swiss Cottage interchange to the other if you don't have your head out the window screaming KANT KANT FACKING KANT the whole time?
  10. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    To extend the middle finger in a vertical direction and displayed toward another as a sign of contempt, arrogance or sexual alusion.

    Now, me dear, is there anything else I can explain? :wink:
  11. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    A: He was driving too fast.
    B: I was ALREADY on the other side of the road when we saw each other.
    C: As I was already on that side of the road before he appeared I had right of way.
    D: He did not slow to let me complete the manouvre, but kept on coming, knowing I had nowhere to go.
    E: Even though he had stacks and stacks of time to see the situation, and therefore react, he knowingly braked hard at the last moment, simply for effect, and thus, any panic in his vehicle was down to him.
    F: He is a cnut.

    Edited because I can't spell.
  12. So you're the w*nker in the volvo about 08.00 this morning :? :D
  13. Oh, go on then - sexual alusion hahahaha!!!! :D
  14. That is of course one way to drive.... but you might find quite a few graves full of people who were "exercising their right of way" against traffic that had nowhere else to go.

    If you drive defensively you may actually find yourself driving a lot longer than those who don't.
  15. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Whoops. Misspelling. Should read allusion..

    To allude to the aforementioned and extended digit being employed in a sexual manner, for example to dial a number of a hooker. :D