Took a roast dinner round to my nan's on Sunday.
After putting it in the fridge, I put the kettle on. She appeared to be asleep so I tried to wake her to let her know I'd brought her dinner. No matter how I tried, I couldn't, and it quickly dawned on me that she may have passed away....
I don't know what came over me, I kissed her and caressed her breasts.
Feelings I thought didn't exist welled up in me and in no time at all I had laid her on the settee, pulled her skirt up, pulled her surgical stockings down and as I pulled her inconti pants to one side I entered her....for a couple of minutes I gave in to my animal instincts but just as I was about to reach an explosive climax, she opened her eyes and shouted "BOOO!!!"

I mean, what kind of sick cunt pretends to be dead?
We need pictures. Pictures or it never happened.
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