My wife bought an ABdurapower for new year

Discussion in 'The Intelligence Cell' started by BaldricksBullet, Jan 26, 2007.

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  1. DREAMS IN A BOX - A brilliant body for a fiver.

    I had to laugh... my wife bought a box featuring a bloke with drug induced mussles on the front and a bird on the back who would sneer at Ben Affleck if he offered to buy her a drink. Inside, were electric pulsers that tickled her tummy while she laid on the couch eating chocolate and chips.

    Me... I cut down the booze and gave myself a regular beasting (light because I've become a bit of a nonce).

    Needless to say... One month on... I've got my shape back and she just lost 5 pounds (and by pounds I mean quid)... and she still looks like a pear.

    Are we that stupid that we think we can slim by spending a fiver, or that the next Fusion2 razor with 10 blades will give us a better shave, or that the new even whiter washing powder (bereft of chemicals because of H&SE) will make our clothes cleaner... Just because of pretty pictures, a famous name and a higher price.

    That said... I'm gonna buy one of those new orange squeezers. You put one orange in and get twice as much juice out! Forget the law "matter can not be created or destroyed"... Einstein proved this was not true, so my nuclear juicer will sit there proud and unused as of next week.
  2. Is your orange squeezer the same as the one that sits with my Electric Carving Knife, the Vegetable Juicer, the Breadmaker, the Abdominiser, the Pen that has 17 different attachments (including a torch), the Feng-Shui Waterfall Feature Ornament(it promises to imporve your life, love and luck)....All in a box in the garage?

    I am SOOO Gullible...
  3. No, we have all ours out on display... to make the neighbours think they have to buy one too.

    PS... with legs like that... best not go around on ARRSE telling people how gullible you are :smile:
  4. But I know I'm gullible - and I'm receiving treatment for it. The Doctor says that for only £250 per 30 minute session he can cure me in only 20 sessions.

    For best results I have to see him naked and covered in whipped cream. I think it's working...
  5. Legs... do you want to buy an ABdurapower? It's brilliant. I'd be sorry to let it go since it just works so well, but for a tenner I could throw in the contact gel which would save you a fortune in cream.
  6. Oh, go on then...

    You should be in sales you know!
  7. Allow me to intoduce you to the ARRSE Diet Plan. Never fails.

    1. Eat less

    2. Move more
  8. Biggest waste of money i the time, brand new Laser Disc Player!! After shelling out £450 and buying only 2 discs for it, it sat in my 2 man room under the portable tv, for all and sundry to look over and for me to play the same bit from Apocalypse Now (hueys attacking the village) commenting how good the pic quality was!!

    Sold it for pennies year later when some idiot brought out DVD's for half the price!! :shakefist:
  9. A fiver? Your wife must have bought the cheapo version. A mate of mine had one a couple of years back (actually he might still have it) that he'd paid over 50 quid for.

    As an instrument of torture it was fantastic, but I've absolutely no idea if it toned muscles or not.

    Try using it without the gel....on full power.......on people you don't like.
  10. The only fitness benefit I could work out that you gain from a juicer was all the calories you would burn by cleaning the damn thing. Mine had so many fiddly bits on it was a good 20min job.
    If you want to go down the electric route try these.


  11. Or

    1. Eat Entamoeba histolytica

    2. Take 2 months sick, lie on the couch eating chocolate and chips.

    But DON'T DON'T DON'T watch TV Shop
  12. While you’re here BB can you answer this question? An old mucker of mine got me one of your fine bullets as a Christmas present and very comforting it is too! I would like to know if many Brits order anything other than an AK round (that being the most likely to be in use by someone you have upset)? Also if you start doing 50 calibre let me know as perhaps I can get my full name on then!