Mr Snail

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Dale the snail, Dec 21, 2004.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. That w anker won't let me see my dog over Christmas.

    Many buckets cried and many miles driven.

    How shall I kill him?
  2. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

  3. I would love to have a dog at Christmas, but I'm usually too pissed on Christmas eve to pull anything in the pub. :D

    You could always cut his bollocks off with a bayonet, but if you want to do it properly don't use one from an SA 80!
  4. He probably decided that you were dumbing the poor dog down. And I'll wager it's hygene habits are preferable too. :p
  5. Just shut up and get my dog. There's a good chap.
  6. Show him the stumpy pic & tell him that if he doesn't hand the dog over, you'll give me his address ;)

    Or you could poison the water supply for his area.....sometimes the ends DO justify the means :twisted:
  7. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    bit extreme isn't it?
  8. Maybe, Papa, but a happy Slug means less aggro for everyone, so the sacrifice would be worth it. Especially since his water supply is so far from mine :D
  9. Dirt_Diver

    Dirt_Diver LE Moderator

    who cares about that? we all have block buttons. :D
  10. Jack H, papa, the RSPCA have actually got a court order out on Dale.
    It reads as follows;
    Just the messanger you understand. :wink:

    Dale, I am acting in the best interests of the Kennel Club, humanity and the furtherment of the animal kingdom.
  11. point taken, Flashy. Can I just add the dog to my list of conquests, then? Surely the most humane solution all round...... :lol:
  12. Don't beleive all you hear about a dog being for life and not just for Christmas. I tried it last year and only made a Corgi last to mid January - wasn't even as tasty as turkey.
  13. He has to let it out some time. Just lay in wait.

    or, you could come see my Dog.
  14. Buy a bigger dog, let it eat your old dog, now you have a better dog due to natural selection and survival of the fittest. :twisted: