moral Dilemma

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by JP47, Mar 16, 2008.

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  1. Devil Dog please advise on the following

    Right I was on concorde the other week and the pilot comes yelling over the tannoy and said the wings have fell off.Everybody started screaming so I punched my arms through the fuselage and started flapping my arms.The pilot regained control and started bringing us into land and my arms were getting fekin cold now.As we descended he comes on the tannoy again"the landing gear won't come down" here we go again I thought so I stamped my feet through just as we hit the tarmac and I starts running like fek and as luck would have it stopped just short of the terminal.I put the plane down give my arms a bit of a rub and noticed my new shoes were fekin ruined so I went to see the pilot.I says"you owe me a pair of clarkes " and he then notices the air hostess sucking my c-ck and gets a bit shirty with it."You show off cnut" he says and swings a punch so I slapped him like a redheaded stepchilld, shot my load and headed home.
    Thing is my new bird is a bit of a looney yoghurt knitter.Should I tell her about the whole sorry affair or keep quiet
  2. Who cares.

    Did you nick the wheels off the plane?

    Thieving scouse git xx
  3. I think I read about this in the papers, you should tell her incase she has read it too.

    What is a Yoghurt Knitter?
  4. Honest slugs it's true.....wannna buy a set of wheels for your passion wagon
  5. Depends what sort of wheels they are, and will they fit on a Mazda.

    I mean very expensive Mercedes. Fuck it, if you lot are going to fib, so am I.
  6. I'm not lying but the air hostess was a right walt, reckons she was a captain in the para's.....oh $hit
  7. JP47, you are Bruce Willis and I claim my prize of some new hubcaps.
  8. You're a lying Bastard JP 47.

    Concorde was retired a few years ago and isn't allowed to fly any more. Are you sure it wasn't an RAF VC10, and the Stewardess wasn't actually a 17 stone Cpl called Dave?
  9. Dave was a mover. He was 19 stone and liked to be called "Lily". JP47 told me so. So it must be true.
  10. Devil Dog doesn't appear to be biting.

    He's off saving the world just now and then he's debating whether or not to tell his missus about how he wears his underpants outside his trousers.

    He will bite.
  11. Hey Legs I resemble that remark and you bl00dy leave dave alone he looks quite fetching when he's had a shave
  12. Sluggs he only likes to be called lily at a weekend and it's our special name so fek off
  13. Really? A likely tale!

    What size gloves do you wear and how long are your legs. JP?

    You'd need size 650,000 gloves to achieve the correct lift to weight ratio from mere arm flapping and your legs would need to be at least 8' long to get from the cabin through the cargo hold to the deck.

    If your real name is Laura and this is you, I apologise!


  14. Well I did have a pair of loose fitting marigolds on and my legs go all the way to my feet so that pi$$es on your theory sherlock :lol: