Monty417
RIP
D0lly86 said:Lampard said:Kill him.
Then..
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. Now when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig s***, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
You have to pull out the finger and toe nails too unfortunately.
Personally I would put them through a wood chipper and into a river.
True, porkers are much fussier than people think. Put a razor blade in with their scoff and you'll find it still there after they've cleaned the trough. Unlike fcuking MPs, they'll have the lot.
Wood chipper straight into the river sounds the thing. Puts a new slant on the mafia saying. 'Feeding the fishes'. Nice.