Moat, The Movie.

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Pull-up-a-sandbag, Jul 14, 2010.

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  1. Now we all know it's coming, Moat the movie. Hollywood will pick this up and turn it into next summers blockbuster. So, bearing this in mind I was discussing this with my work mates and we thought Tom Cruise plays Moat, Angeiina Jolie plays his missus, 19yrs old grandmother of twelve from Birtley, etc.
    I am sure that the esteemed arrsers will come up more Hollywoodisms that can be applied to Downtown Rothbury.
  2. Gazza to play The World Weary Drunk.
  3. Who is going to play plod?
  4. Better still, I vote plod plays plod, couldn't be funnier.
  5. That Vin Diesel bloke to play Moat... he's certainly thick enough.
  6. Auld-Yin

    Auld-Yin LE Reviewer Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    Pte Golden can lead the SF team that assisted plod.

    Flashy would of course be the fast jet jockey talking about the 'sortie' over Northumberland while quaffing wine spritzers in the Mess..

    Lady Jane (from the gallery) can play the Acting Chief Plod.
  7. It'll be NYPD, SFPD or LAPD.

    It all depends on where it's set.
  8. The cast from Hot Fuzz play the Plod
  9. The closing song has to be "You're the One that I Want" from Grease.

    Dig the lyrics, man.

  10. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    That bird from The Vicar of Dibley to play Temporary Chief Constable Sue Sim.

  11. I can easily picture Nic Cage as the gurning Tazer monkey.
  12. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    The chief inspector could be the really bad English b'stard who's the enemy of the Northern tribes, with Moaty screaming "Ngggnnnnnnnnnnnn . . . . . . . freeeEEEDDOOOOOOMMMMMMM . . . . . . ngngngngngngn . . . ." as the evil English electricity makes him flex all his super powerful and manly muscles, just before he heroically blows his head off in defiance of his oppressors!

    It might help if we use a bit more Hollywood licence and have him paint his face blue, and have all his web-footed chums wearing kilts too.
  13. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    Mel Gibson as Moaty so as to keep it authentic.
  14. Mandelson as the unsuspecting plod who was shot in his car. But with real bullets.
  15. My kok to play The Shotgun - goes off when you least expect it and takes away half your face.