Blue Water Navy goes Green!
Thanks to a revolutionary new process, the MoD has been able to generate smart-processes to implement material recycling in major defence projects.
In the first example of its kind, HMS Ark Royal is to be the pilot-project for the Defence Unwanted Material and Broken Equipment Recycling (DUMBER) initiative. Having been scheduled for immeadiate disposal, 'The Ark' would normally have been allowed to rot on a dockyard for years to come. According to Rear-Admiral Hugh J.A. Jenda, this would not only have looked bad, but would have posed a threat to wildlife as well:
"Seagulls like to nest on hulks" he says, "probably due to the reamining fishy whiff. However, they can also be death-traps for the birds - and we often have to deploy teams to free gulls who's heads have become trapped in scuppers."
However, in the case of the 'Ark', twitchers can rest assured that their feathered muses will not suffer such a fate. As the Admiral says:
"We realised that by cutting her up into razor blades, we can not only remove the unwanted hazardous scrap from our Island's shores - and I might take this opportunity to remind readers, that we are in fact an island - but that we could also scrape back some cash to pay for our bigger toys."
Readers in Camp Bastion will therefore be pleased to note that commemerative "M'Ark 3" razor blades will be available in EFIs shortly, at a special price of £50 per pack of 5.
In other news, RAF Regiment Gunners in Afghanistan celebrated lifting their barrier for the 10,000th time......