Mild Winter and North/South Reactions

Found this as an old file and it seems relevant and forms some light relief during our mild winter .
10°C Southerners turn on heating … Northumbrians plant gardens

5°C Southerners shiver uncontrollably … Northumbrians go sunbathing

2°C Southerners cars will not start … Northumbrians drive with windows down

-5°C Southerners don coats , hats , gloves and woolly hats …
Northumbrians throw on a T shirt

-10°C Southerners start to emigrate … Northumbrians go skinny dipping in the North Sea

-20°C Southern landlords turn up heat in Pubs … Northumbrians have a barbecue before it gets too cold

-25°C Southerners cease to exist … Northumbrians slip on a light jacket

-50°C Polar bears wonder if it is worthwhile struggling on …
Northumbrian boy scouts put on long trousers

-75°C Santa abandons the North Pole … Northumbrians put on long johns

-113°C Alcohol freezes … Northumbrians get frustrated as the Pubs are shut

-200°C Microbial life begins to disappear … Northumbrian cows complain about farmers’ cold hands

-273°C Absolute zero and all atomic motion ceases ….
Northumbrians stamp their feet and blow on their hands
In Yorkshire the lasses put on two hairnets
CrownImperial said:
Are you from the North by any chance?
There is a hint in Border_Reiver .
acrab! said:
Northumbrians are hardly northerners!
But they are both whinging dirty cnuts so its a easy mistake to make
Stop coming the big one you plastic Jock.

I bet you wear dresses.
Only submitted this post to find a source for Thinsulate Gloves .... as displayed at bottom of page ... not for me of course .

Of course the advert has changed now ... shows how many posts I have submitted ... lesson learned !

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