Last night, for the first time in about ten years, I donned my mess kit. Or rather I got into the jacket and overalls but for some reason, the waistcoat did not even come close to a fit. As I have not varied in suit/shirt size in that period I was nonplussed, especially as the trousers seemed fine. On closer inspection, the waistcoat in question appeared to be a 38" chest size. I believe that on that last occasion I wore it, when I shared a room with another officer of the Royal Regiment as drunk and in a rush as I were, he must have gone home with my fecking waistcoat! Now I cannot for the life of me even begin to think who said officer was but I remember him being of the smaller variety. So he has probably been worried that he has a wasting disease for the past decade! Hi-ho, it's dinner jacket for Cuddles then this weekend...Shame, I was quite excited when I managed to get into the overalls and sit down without a bursting sound, like an SF GPMG from behind!