Mess Games Compendium

Discussion in 'OTC and ACF' started by Capt Cheeky, Feb 11, 2004.

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  1. A friend of mine serving in an OTC asked me for some suggestions for mess games. So here I am asking for inspiration to help them out in their mission to liven up training night booze sessions....

    Anyway to start things off:

    The Maggot Race

    Stores required:

    Copious amounts of beer
    Two x Sleeping Bags
    Various Items of Furniture with balanced items on top


    Arrange furniture into a pseudo assault course in the mess. There must be two identical routes through to negate the chance for cheating.

    Form two teams of identical size / ability behind each route.

    On the command Go the first person must down his / her pint and then climb into the sleeping bag ensuring that only their head is protruding. (Sleeping bags must be fully closed to ensure that elbows etc aren't used)

    After the person is fully inside the fastened sleeping bag, they must complete the course and return by the same route without knocking over the items balanced on the furniture.

    Penalties (time or booze) should be enforced by the referee for knocking over the furniture / missing obstacles / excessive spillage or knocking over the balanced items.

    The next person in the team then sinks their pint and attempts the course until the entire team completes the process.

    The first team to have every member back in line wins.
  2. I'll leave the explanation of Mess Rugby, the Broom Race, et al to the experts. My favourite, however, was played in the old 24 Airmob Bde Mess at Catterick with visiting QAs from the DKMH (yes, it was a few years ago). We played piggy back fights, with the QAs as jockeys and very strict rules as to when you could let go of the jockey or 'dismount'. After several pints of Theakstons, it was a fairly rioutous affair with a large number of both horse and rider sporting large, colourful carpet burns on face, hands and knees. The morning after the night before prompted considerable comment from both the Chain of Command and patients and staff at the hospital! Giddyup horsey! :D
  3. I like the drinkin bridge, guaranteed to get at least on person hospitalised.

    One person legs on chair, holding up front as in the press up position, next person crawls along and used sholders of first for feet and also adopts press-up position,

    very good fun old bean
  4. A while ago i remember being told about a "drinking range". Executed in the style of a shooting cup. Anyone know how this would work? I only remember the bit about being "cleared onto the range" by having to sink whatever drink you had
  5. The Neck Breaker...

    :evil: <Caution Required> :evil:

    Not really a mess game more of a mess challenge...

    Stores Required:

    3 x Identical Bar Stools


    Three bar stools are to be laid out on a steady piece of flooring.

    Competitor is to lie on all three bar stools.

    Position bar stools so one is in contact with the ankles,
    one is underneath the competitors buttocks,
    final bar stool is positioned under the head.

    The competitor has to remove the middle bar stool (under his / her buttocks) and rotate it around his / her body as many times as possible without falling off or dropping the bar stool. Their body is, in effect, kept upright predominately by the neck muscles and hence is an endurance / stamina event.

    It has been known for a former Mortar Pl Capt to do this 21 times before ending up a red faced wreck on the floor.

    Treat this one with caution as it quite a dodgy one to attempt.
  6. Floor Bumper Rodeo

    Stores Required:

    1 x Floor Bumper / Buffer (for polishing floors)
    1 x Kevlar Helmet
    1 x 5m + Length Extension Lead
    1 x Stop watch


    Connect floor bumper to extension lead and into socket.
    Get nutter to stand on floor bumper with helmet on holding onto handle.
    Start stopwatch when nutter starts up floor bumper and starts spinning at a ludicrous rate of knots.
    Stop stopwatch when the aforementioned idiot falls off.
    Repeat until a champion is found or Bumper is classed as u/s (yes that was us that broke the old one hidden in the guys shunkie)

    Floor bumpers spin faster than you may realise also make sure the thing has passed an electrical safety test as you are dabbling with mains electricity here. Don't blame me if any of these kill you! :twisted:
    "Only a dick plays with Mr Electricity"
  7. msr

    msr LE

    Wibbly Wobbly

    Traditionally played on a cricket pitch, but can easily be converted for indoor use:

    2xbarstools spaced approx 20m apart

    1) Down Pint
    2) Place forehead on bar stool
    3) Run round barstool n times
    4) Pick up boot and set off for the other bar stool
    5) Run round second bar stool and finish by placing boot on first barstool

  8. they beevy game

    every one sits down and drinks lots and whoever gets sick first....... Sorry that a Unit dinner night, my bad :oops:
  9. mess jousting,

    you need one broom stick, one bucket and a number of drunkard.

    firstly, get drunk. secondly, adopted the piggy back position, upper most drunkard holding broom. thirdly, spin round a set number of times until piggy backee feels very dizzy/ is on the verge of throwing up. Fourthly, aim in general direction of bucket placed on a chair, at other end of the mess. Fifthly, piggy backee runs as fast as possible towards bucket. Sixthly, piggy backer attempts to penetrate bucket with outheld broom.

    What usually results is a heap of mangled bodies half way down the course after piggy backee collapses into the crowd having set off at right angles to bucket.

    For added excitement try placing bucket under the largest, most valued painting in the mess. If the jousters hit the bucket they are champions for a minute. If they hit the painting they're interviewed by the CO without coffee and by the RSM with a big stick!
  10. Advice on this one is, "go last". Namely, as a OCdt piper at a University Air Squadron dinner, invited to the post-dinner mess bash (thanks, lads :) ) along with your CO :(, and having watched an Air Vice-Marshal and a Lt. Col have a go, along with lots of baby members of the two-winged master race, and seen same reduced to red-faced wrecks....... casually attempt same in No.1s, and beat the cr*p out of all of their scores.

    The other advice is to have a well-fitting four-inch-wide full-dress black plastic waist belt with a sturdy metal buckle, operating like a weight-lifters belt, and giving large amounts of unfair support. Also sneaking as many cervical vertebra onto the head stool as you can, without being noticed :twisted: Up there for thinking, down there for dancing, as my Dad always said.....
  11. mess climbing

    You need
    1x mess
    2+ x drunken idiots

    Rule is starting at either ends you must get the whole way around the mess without toching the ground and when the contestant pass each othe get one chance each to knock the other to the ground.

    Not sure if its ever been completed only ever seen it being done to sort out which of the two chaps was to be the 'taker' for the evening, or some other type of petty argument :)
  12. When I was at RCB a similar version of the game was played but with the weaker version of a full pint glass. One girl quite readily put all others to shame with 250 rotations. She only stopped when we started to get bored...
  13. Rumour had it that there was a CO appointed to fill the gap in his Battalion caused by the...sudden departure... of his predecessor and RSM (big bullying scandal in the late 1980s).

    He had enjoyed just such a night's entertainment :roll: . After the oil painting got a lancing, he decided that an attempt to join Hereford was timely (one version has the Adjutant suggesting same), and he spent a large chunk of time there before returning to a Battalion where hardly anyone could remember him. And doing a hell of a good job, by all accounts.
  14. Popped into the Royal Signals mess in Blandford and they had this quite bizarre game involving the wooden beams above the bar.... can't really remember much else of that night apart from one chap fell off to everyones amusement. :lol:

    Anyone able to shed some light onto this old chesnut ?
  15. There was another that involved a log... numerous nails and a toffee hammer.... yet again can't remember for the life of me what the rules were... again any suggestions ? :?