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Merry Christmas you pack of sad, ugly bastards ;)

We had Christmas dinner here tonight and it was crap.

The lad in front of me was given a turkey head amongst his meat, whilst I was busy pissing myself laughing at it, the slop jockey put a roast turkey neck on my tray. I got rid of that and had some beef fillet instead, which had had all of the flavour cooked out of it.

Christmas in Iraq is shit.....

Merry Christmas you reprobates.
 
E5399B30-BB26-41B2-8120-8843016F6703.jpeg
 

Chef

LE
What can I say other than

God bless us, every one.
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
We rightly remember the fallen who gave their lives fighting for their country in the various conflicts the UK and it’s allies have fought in since the First World War and we thank the many others for their service including some who currently haunt these pages and have suffered sometimes devastating injuries.

I think it’s right to add this time around given the pandemic that’s hit us this year, another dimension to our thoughts tomorrow on Christmas Day.

Everyday, many thousands of NHS frontline staff, Doctors, Nurses, Care Assistants and many others are routinely placing themselves at considerable risk from the pandemic.

Carers in nursing homes and residential care homes are also finding themselves in the frontline providing hands on care to the vulnerable and elderly people including all those who have been infected with COVID-19 and who must rely on them for the care they need.

Many of these care workers have suffered serious life threatening illness and most sadly, some of them have lost their lives treating those who have been struck down by this illness.

So let’s for a few moments tomorrow on Christmas Day add them to our thoughts as well and think of them, think of the lives they have saved and remember, the battle goes on.

Don’t forget, while we are celebrating the day tomorrow, the colleagues they have left to carry on the work will still be there looking after the sick all day and every day after for some considerable time yet until this terrible disease is finally defeated by vaccines now being rolled out.

All of them and especially those who have lost their lives in this pandemic deserve at the very least, a few moments of reflection tomorrow for what they have done for us all.

All that said, I personally wish all arrsers a merry Christmas, a happy and prosperous new year and a safe new year which will hopefully see us end the pandemic and return to our normal lives.

Lastly, seeing as this is in the NAAFI, you can rip the shit out of that!
Well I’m completely lost for words.
 

Yokel

LE
It cannot be Christmas. I have not heard this in any shops or similar places:



Merry Christmas.

I want to have as much fun as Clark Griswald. As for my preferred drink:


I think I need quite a few of them. At least seasonal girl watching has still been possible this year.
 
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SANTA APOLOGISES

Santa has left this message:

"Dear children,

You will probably have heard of the nasty illness that is spreading around the world. To try to stop it spreading, people travelling from country to country have to quarantine (that means stay alone, not meet anybody and not travel) for between 7 days and 14 days in each country they enter. This causes problems for me as I usually travel through 195 countries in a single night.

THE GOOD NEWS is that I anticipated this so I left presents with your parents a few days ago.

THE BAD NEWS is that there are about 180 countries between New Zealand (my first stop) and the United Kingdom so it will take about 3 years to reach the UK after I set off next year. In other words, my next Christmas present delivery to you won't be until 2023.

I have to be seen as being fair so, because you won't be getting any presents, you can be as naughty as you like in 2021 and 2022. Just remember to be good in 2023.

Lots of love,

Santa"

Seems reasonable, I suppose.
 
Merry Christmas to you all

Yes, even YOU and YOU - its goodwill to all men (and wives too I suppose) today.

Santa has been and liberally emptied his sack underneath our tree, the dirty bastard, so all is well in the gaijin household, at least until we have all had a few drinks and the Christmas day arguments kick off.

May you all have a lovely day.
 
I have more fruit salad than that Patton wanna be. Sprog.

It's turkey necks and smashed taters and gravy at the Veterans Home for Christmas dinner. Afterwards it's mixed pills and a mug of Horlicks before Nurse shoos me off to bed. Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year, you sorry lot of scumbags. You're my kind of rotters.

1903 Thanksgiving Menu Dayton VA Home (2).JPG
Unknown SP5 from 119th AHC Hidden.png
 
I have more fruit salad than that Patton wanna be. Sprog.

It's turkey necks and smashed taters and gravy at the Veterans Home for Christmas dinner. Afterwards it's mixed pills and a mug of Horlicks before Nurse shoos me off to bed. Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year, you sorry lot of scumbags. You're my kind of rotters.

View attachment 532583View attachment 532584
That reminds me, whatever happened to virgil? Not seen for a long while.
 
So it's that time of year again... as a pisspoor Buddhist I technically shouldn't give a **** about Christmas, but as I just said, pisspoor. This one is extra-special because I nearly didn't get to the party. thank you Arrsers for seeing me through a tough time and keeping a smile on my face,and .special thanks to all who pm'd me to ask about my boot size ;). You're a pack of diamond geezers and geezerettes. Admittedly a pack of cnuts as well, but hey, nothing's perfect. I think I can safely say I'm in the clear now, for the time being at least and am back to eating like a bird, drinking like a fish ( albeit a minnow ;) ) and smoking dope like rhe late, great Bob. What? Where's everybody gone and why is the door to Dead Pool 2020 swinging ???

Talking of Mr Marley, this is my mate, his sound engineer's favourite Christmas song and is mine now too. Enjoy!!!! A very Merry Christmas to you all and to all your loved ones !!!!


I blame brexit
 

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