A post by Senor Chavez reminiscing about adventure training in Lake Naivasha, Kenya got me thinking. I've done 5 tours in that wonderful country and have a raft of fond memories - bukkake parties in the old Jambo House; 12 of us surrounding 2 whores and turning them into something resembling candlestick holders, laughing at an AIDS raddled whore who, while plugging her cunt with a Tusker bottle, lost bowel control and turned a rather ordinary evening in Nanyuki into a scatologists dream. Blowing up a giant tortoise with HE grenades, shooting a wounded camel, doing my dhobi in the lodge swimming pool, getting sucked off in the Riverside by a whore based purely on the basis she looked like Whoopi Goldberg, watching an elephant cry, laughing at a fat medic who genuinely thought he'd bagged off at the Sportsman's, paying 20 shillings to watch a coon called John Barnes batter a coon called Ian Beale, eating a veggie samosa and 15 minutes later wondering why I'd just sharted, watching a local in Archer's Post bathing in a croc infested river who had two bell ends, feeding insects my DNA, running away from lions on a night exercise and paying for 3 very underage 'hairdressers' in Watamu to take turns sucking me off. Exercise Grand Prix is the only thing, apart from selling stolen rations and MTP equipment on eBay, which makes the army bearable these days. Any more dits about women with cunts resembling velcro dipped in cottage cheese?