me no happy

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by tommy1990, Mar 31, 2009.

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  1. why cant woman shave ffs..... i hate the feel of a womans moustache on my top lip :x does anyone else have this problem. and yes im sure it isnt a dude....
  2. you on about her face or her fanny?
  3. :eek: Waxing is so much more better than shaving...
  4. ive got another problem with her she wants to go out with me but shes a minger and smells like fish insides and mentally fragile?/retarded. and i work with her.... how do i tell he to go die n leave me alone nicely?
  5. Tommy - just tell her, a quick wax will soon sort it out. She's probably already aware of the problem, just a bit
    slow in dealing with it!
  6. Scream at her, run, then dropkick her in the face.
    Drop your kegs and then smear your arrse across her face back and forth whilst giving her a line or two from The Exorcist.
    Quickly have a wnak and blow your load in your hand then slap it on her now hopefully bloody and brown face spiderman style.

    It's worked for me anyway.
  7. Tell your gran that you don't mind fucking her for a share of her pension, but you draw the line at snogging her too.
  8. Is this occurring at night with the light off. It could be you are getting into bed with her mother.
  9. Nicely? FFS! You are asking here, in the NAAFI bar for 'nicely'?

    Anyway, I thought the care workers were forbidden to have relations with the Belms in their care?

    That hair, thats a side effect of all the mind bending anti-psychotic drugs they keep them dosed up on. It's to stop them getting the red mist and killing small children and pets.
  10. LancePrivateJones

    LancePrivateJones LE Book Reviewer

    What the fuck is up with bearded females anyway?

    Getting a bit fucking fussy ain't we?

    If you are a serving soldier, bearded or moustashioed females are regarded with deep respect and should be treated like the ladies that they are.

    Consider yourself lucky.

  11. Are you 100% sure it's not a Bloke?

    Usually the name Roy is a dead giveaway!!!
  12. Yeah, does she insist on taking it up the arse with the lights off?
  13. firstly, no never had that problem... i tend to prefer my women a little less...well... blokeish

    what the fcuk did you kiss her for in the first place then??? personally... if i see a beached whale flapping her bingo wings about town... i try avoid her general area, let alone kiss her..... so why would you kiss this girl, in full knowledge she looks/smells like a dirty nappy??
  14. I do feel its wrong to talk about your mother like that.